


To Never Submit Again

by ShunKickShunKers



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: AU, Alpha/Omega, Character Death (or not), Gen, Pack Dynamics, Pack Family, no powers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-24
Updated: 2014-12-28
Packaged: 2018-02-14 12:14:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2191443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShunKickShunKers/pseuds/ShunKickShunKers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Promise me, omega-mine, to walk your own path. Never let an alpha, me included, hinder your decisions. Never let an alpha make you submit again.”</p>
<p>Natasha is the best lawyer of Murdock Corp. She is also an omega who never was officially bounded. That is, until someone who was supposed to be dead decides to return and claim what was his.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've been reading alpha/omega stories lately and thought, why not? Unbeta-ed work, so all mistakes are mine. Hope you'll enjoy this :)

**To Never Submit Again  
**

**1**

 

It had been a busy morning at Murdock Corp. The company was the most well-known for its integrity and competent lawyers. Natasha Romanoff was one of the bests among them, and being the best often meant bringing down big fishes. Unfortunately, big fishes also meant loads of work and when the clock stroked twelve, Natasha was all-too-glad to shut her laptop down and grab her lunchbox.

She usually sat at the same table and was joined from time to time by colleagues. The most regular lunch-mate was Loki Odinsson, one of the two lawyers she genuinely enjoyed talking to (most of her colleagues were nice, but boring and sometimes full of themselves. Loki was ambitious and had wits and didn't feel the need to hide it). The other was Virginia Potts, who was alas often out of town for a case. Then, Darcy Lewis, Loki's assistant (although Natasha couldn't quite say they were friends, but the brunette was one of those people you couldn't help but feel affection for after a while). Steve Rogers was a journalist working for the company part-time, but he was easy to talk with and the others didn’t mind him.

Pepper was a bounded alpha, Loki was a single beta and Darcy a happily bounded omega, another reason why she liked hanging out with them. Given her behavior and position in the company as one of the bests, she was mistakenly thought to be an alpha. It was not well-known fact that Natasha Romanoff was an omega. Steve’s presence as a single alpha could have actually been a danger to her status, but he behaved so much like a beta she didn’t feel threatened.

“I heard there would be a new guy in management” Darcy, always the gossip, blurted straight ahead when Natasha sat at their table. “Didn’t catch his name but Jane told me he was a hottie.”

Natasha nearly rolled her eyes in amusement. Steve gave her a surprised look.

“Why would they hire someone else? I thought the department was full.”

“They kicked out Sitwell because of that stupid stunt he pulled last time.” She replied nonchalantly. “That asshole had been trying to order his way around since he’s got there. I swear, his alpha bullshit was getting to everyone.”

“I just hope the new recruit will be competent” Loki said dryly. “Management really needs to be reorganized. Do you happen to know if he’s an alpha?”

Darcy nodded.

“Yups. Currently single too. Who knows,” she added, wriggling her eyebrows at Natasha. “Maybe your unbounded status will change in the near future.”

Natasha gave her a pointed look.

“I don’t need an alpha in my life.” She said dryly. She had worked too hard to get where she was today. Her status as an omega had been a real challenge the first years. But she had proven herself competent and efficient and more importantly, professional to an extreme in spite of alpha advances, so eventually her bosses had let her take over more important missions. And with the recent laws for omega independence, she was the poster girl for the ‘successful omega without alpha backup’. Her friends respected her decision of remaining single. Darcy’s dab was more a teasing than a real insensitive remark.

However, Steve interjected:

“You should be careful. You’re beautiful and strong-willed. He might see you as a challenge and take advantage of his position to make some…demands” he finished awkwardly. Natasha gave him an indulgent smile, knowing he was just trying to look out for her. No-one in the company had dared make a move on her since the day she busted a former colleague’s teeth for putting his hand on her behind. The legend still ran today.

“I’m always careful, but thank you.” she then turned to Loki and asked with a smirk: “So, I heard your brother was back from Norway.”

The change of subject went swiftly and soon enough the new guy was forgotten. It wasn't until the end of the day (a very tiring and frustrating day, she might add) that the subject of her being single came up again. Since she and Darcy had parking spaces close to another, they waited upon the other to leave. In a way, this habit helped Romanoff to have a more stable equilibrium in her everyday life. Darcy, as implicated as she might be in her job, was no workaholic and if she hadn't been here to help maintaining stable work hours, Natasha would have probably ended sleeping at her workplace more than once.

“I told you, I was totally right when I said Steve was aiming for you as his omega,” Darcy claimed with a self-satisfied smirk they headed to the parking lot. When Natasha winced, she added: “What’s the big deal? He’s totally all over you. Some girls would kill to have him. Hell, if I didn’t have Richard, I’d kill to have him.”

“You prefer bad boys,” Natasha retorted, amused. She waited until the elevator doors were closed to continue. “You’d find Steve boring.”

“And you are avoiding the question.” Darcy’s tone was no longer teasing. The slight frown on her face indicated she was actually quite serious. “I’m worried for you sometimes. I know you're all for independence, but wouldn't you be better off with an alpha?”

“Me being alone never bothered you before,” the redhead said a little stiffly. Darcy raised her hands in defense.

“I don’t give a damn, but after Hammer swore he’d get back at you for busting his sorry ass last week, I’d say I’d rather like to know someone’s watching your back. I’ve heard rumors about stuff he did to people who got in his way before and trust me, the stories aren’t pretty.”

“Hammer’s all barks and no bites.” Natasha replied. “But even if he did, I can handle myself. And the reason why I won’t bind with Steve is simple; I already have an alpha.” _Technically_.

Darcy’s jaw fell low in shock.

“Y…y…you… _what_? But you _never_ -”

Natasha sighed.

“Leave it Darcy, I don’t want to talk about it. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And she left the assistant staring, mouth wide open in disbelief.

 

AO

 

Her residence's parking was full, which wasn't a surprise. More than once Natasha had spotted an unfamiliar car on her parking spot and had to move to find another one, but tonight, someone had decided she needed to park outside of her building and get three blocks away, which pissed her to no end. So when she walked the half-mile back to her apartment, literally fuming, she didn’t realize right away two guys were following her closely. It wasn’t until she was brusquely pulled aside in an aisle and a hand covered her mouth with a leather glove that she realized she should have been more on her guard.

Her reflexes were immediate: she kicked her assailant in the shine, in the face, but the second grabbed her hair and slammed her head against the wall repetitively, efficiently knocking her out.

When she woke up, she was lying on a something hard and cold and dusty, and a syringe was poking out of her arm. Natasha immediately pulled it out and checked the contents. Yups, it had been full. A quick look around confirmed that she had been brought in one of those old buildings, typical warehouse like, on the edge of crumbling down.

“Miss Romanoff, what a pleasure!”

To her utter horror, Justin Hammer, former CEO of Hammer enterprise (and also accused of stealing State secrets and recognized guilty and supposedly imprisoned for a _very_ long time) appeared before her, a huge smirk on his face and rubbing his hand in satisfaction.

“Do you remember me? Of course you do, I am unforgettable!” The cheerfulness in his voice gave her the creeps. “I have to say, I had a hard time forgetting you, Miss Romanoff. You were like a hound on my back for months before that trial. I usually love having beautiful women running after me, but what you did?” he tss-ed with a disapproving stare. “I did not enjoy.”

“If you had, I would have pegged you for a masochist” she retorted dryly, not willing to let that idiot get the upper hand so easily. He was surrounded by a dozen goons, which diminished considerably her chances of escaping unscratched. “And this reception committee is all for me? I’m flattered.”

If Hammer had been expecting her to cower in fear, he didn’t show it.

“You are so driven” he went on, ignoring her little rant. “I thought you were an alpha, the aggressive kind, you know. At first, I thought I’d make a move on your other half, your omega or whatever, but I was surprised to hear that not only you belonged with the subbed ones, you were also unbounded.” Had she been fully functional, that white clown and his goons would have not stood five minutes. But for some reason an unexpected heat was developing full force and her strength was slowly draining her. That’s when she dreadfully realized what was happening. “I see you understand!” Hammer chipped happily. “Yes, this is indeed my new ‘heat trigger’, I made it especially for you. It increases the heat of an omega until it consumes it, and you will die _begging_ for us to-“

There was an old staircase on her left. Natasha grabbed the rail and forced her mind to focus and her body to move. She would not let the upper hand to that coward. So she did the only thing she could come up with. She ran to the upper level.

“Catch her!” she heard him order sharply.

There was little place for her to hide, no exit she knew of, and given that her head was failing her…She would go down, she knew that much, but she’d go down fighting. When the first one reached her, she kicked his kneecap, snapping the bone there. He crumbled down shouting and she kicked him again in the throat viciously. The next was on her in a heartbeat. She dodged him and pushed him off the stair rail. Two others followed. She picked up a metal bar lying nearby and hit them in with the precision of a professional. But that burst of energy wasn’t enough to fight them off. Whatever drug Hammer had given her was acting up and she tripped and fell to the grown.

_She could feel_ his _eyes on her back as she got rid of her jacket. She ignored it though; she was used to alphas looking. Alexei allowed them to touch occasionally, but never for long. She was his omega after all._ He _made her feel uneasy though._ He _was one of Ivan’s newest recruits, much older than the usual ones. He wasn’t loud and show off, rather quiet and deadly. The first time she saw him in action, a shiver had run down her spine. And then, once his prey had been torn into pieces, he had looked at her. The intensity of his gaze still haunted her._

_“Natalia, is it?” His voice was soft and husky. She turned around to glare at him._

_“Black Widow for you.” she hissed, but her breath got caught in her throat when she realized how close he was. He wasn’t tall, but taller than her. His eyes had a grey blue color to them. He wasn’t the most handsome man she’d ever met, but his features were quite agreeable. He was an alpha, she knew that much; but she hadn’t realized how strong of an alpha he actually was. His presence was overwhelming, his scent strong and rich, stronger and richer than Alexei ever was. His lips stopped by her ear and he whispered:_

_“You are actually mine, aren’t you?”_

“She shouldn’t have been able to do that.” She heard Hammer pester. “This thing isn’t fully developed yet? What is Vanco doing with all the money I give him?”

Helplessness and panic altogether invaded her body and mind. Natasha cursed at the involuntary shaking of her body. She was familiar with that feeling, the inevitability that let her incapable of doing anything but wait for her doom. It had been years since she had felt it and she hated herself for letting her guard down so easily. She had gone soft.

They picked her up and laid her on her back, holding her down as their boss walked cheerfully towards them. Natasha tried to struggle again, but the memory had distracted her. She was sure it had been triggered by Hammer’s heat serum and she hated him more for it. She had tried to burry _him_ in the back of her mind, to forget all about _him_ , because thinking of _him_ hurt too much, still today.

Hammer glanced at his guards and nodded towards one.

“Go ahead, Flint. And take your sweet time.” Then, he glared at her and hissed: “You will regret attacking Justin Hammer.”

‘Flint’ was a large, heavy man. He also had that nasty grin that reminded her of Alexei’s whenever he was in a mood. Her body barely responded when he touched her thighs, and it honestly surprised Natasha. Hammer must have wanted her to suffer through heat and alpha possession. Whatever heat effect he had intended to arise in her had utterly failed…perhaps because she had already secretly bounded in the past.

“Stay still,” he ordered, and his alpha authority willed the omega in her to obey.

_“Why won’t you touch me again?” she asked him. He turned around from his activity and stared at her with a raised eyebrow._

_“Do you want me to touch you?” The look in his eyes was close to disapproval. She flinched. “I hurt you once, Nat. I’m not doing it again without your consent.”_

_“But you’re my alpha!” she protested, fear tightening her guts. Did he not want her anymore? Was he going to abandon her? What was she going to do if he left her behind? “You…I know you want me. Why…”_

_“What I did was_ wrong _.” He snapped, turned around and stared at her straight in the eye. “I lost control, and I shouldn’t have. I should have waited until you were ready.” He put down his work and stepped closer. His hand, callus fingers, rough skin, brushed her cheek. She could read the desire in his eyes, but also the sadness and regret. It hurt her badly, more than she expected. “You’re so young. I should have left you the choice.” Natasha closed her eyes and leaned against his palm. The warmth soothed her a bit. “Promise me, omega-mine, to walk your own path. Never let an alpha, me included, hinder your decisions.” His face was close, she could feel his breath against her forehead. “Never let an alpha make you submit again.”_

Natasha ignored Flint’s alpha order and hit him in the guts. The man squeaked in pain and fell on the side. She was slapped so hard she saw stars.

“What a stubborn one!” Hammer said cheerfully, but she could detect a hint of unease in his voice. He wasn’t used to people resisting him too long. And Natasha was proving herself far stronger than he first thought. She took sharp breaths to regain her control and glared at him.

“They will come for you, Justin Hammer,” she hissed at him. “Once I am dead, my pack will come for you and tear you into pieces.”

Her body was still weakened by the serum, but her threats brought silence among the men. A pack was serious affairs. A pack meant family chosen disregarding the blood rules. A pack also meant meddling, nosy people loyal to each other and also very, very determined to take revenge if one of their own was killed. Going against a revengeful pack meant suicide. Soon after, her eyes closed with a sigh but she forced herself to stay conscious as long as she could. Her senses were messed up but she could still hear and feel their presence around her. None dared to laugh at her last words, not even Hammer.

“Finish her.” she heard him order. His voice had turned worried and quiet. Even he knew the dangers of a pack. “And dump her body in-“

His sentence was cut short and he crumbled on the ground. The men around got agitated and one by one, she felt them fall. Gunshots were heard but even the last one tumbled down with a shocked gurgle.

Natasha smiled. She had no idea who or what had arrived and interrupted them, but she was glad someone had killed that ass of a CEO before he could slip away. Everything became a blur, she had trouble breathing, but it wasn’t painful. Someone knelt by her side, touched her cheek. Although she doubted she would see anything, she opened her eyes. The hazy form of a human being towering her appeared in her sight.

She thought she heard him say something, but she was diving off too far already. What kept her awake was the warmth of the hand against her cheek, reminding her vaguely of another man who, in another lifetime, had ordered her to never give up.

_Sorry Clint. Guess I’ll join you earlier than planned;_ she thought as she closed her eyes and allowed darkness to engulf her once and for all.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The 2nd Chap is done. Might as well post it :)   
> Thank you for the kudos ^^ and hope you enjoy this.   
> Unbeta-ed work, so all mistakes are mine

To Never Submit Again

2

 

She woke to the sound of repetitive beeping and a massive headache. Her body hurt everywhere with arches similar to the aftermaths of a particularly bad heat and her senses were slightly blurred. When Natasha finally managed to regroup enough strength to actually move, she opened her eyes.

White ceiling.

White wallpapers.

Complicated-looking machines on the side.

Uncomfortable bed.

_Hospital_. _Great_.

“There she awakes.” She heard a dry and sarcastic -although relieved- tone by her side. Natasha tilted her head and groaned when she recognized the dark-haired man sitting in a chair besides her bed. He pushed his glasses further up his nose and added, amused: “It’s always a pleasure to see you, Natasha.”

The woman opened her mouth to shoot some snappy comment at him, but the effort gave her a killer headache and she moaned instead. That reaction made the man chuckle.

“This time you really outdid yourself. Alone with a sociopath, an alpha nonetheless, who has a God complex and his goons, while you are high on a heat wave? Congratulations, this must hit the top three of your creepiest kidnapping. If I didn’t know you, I’d think you have a death wish.” He added sarcastically.

“I’ll die the day I die.” she muttered, her throat burning when she spoke. Natasha inhaled slowly and asked: “Water?”

The man stood up, a plastic goblet already in hand and helped her swallow.

“You were lucky.” He said as she drank cautiously. “The heat serum Hammer gave you was slow to activate; the doctors could nullify the effects quickly. You’ve been out for a full day, but you should be out tomorrow morning with nothing else but a bad headache.”

“And this is how I survive again,” she muttered, glaring at her glass. “Tell me Bruce, who was my stalker this time? You? Sam? Maria? Did you have Skye monitor my movements?”

Bruce sighed heavily and sat back on his chair. He was a member of her pack, perhaps the closest she felt to since he was an omega. After Clint’s death, he had been the one looking out for her the most. The stare he shot her made her feel like a child.

“Contrary to what you think, we have more important things to do than following you around.” He pointed out. “I was called as your emergency contact by the hospital. Whoever killed Hammer and the others was long gone when the EMTs arrived. Do you remember anything?”

“I was halfway drugged, in heat, and maybe dying. You really think I had anything else in mind?” she paused and tried to think. “I don’t remember a lot of shooting though. One of Hammer’s goons fired a weapon, but he was the only one. Maybe the guy had a silencer?”

Bruce seemed deep in thoughts at her words, just like each time he was simmering for an answer to a theory he found quite interesting.

“Maybe.” He eventually said. “I was hoping you’d see whoever saved you.”

“Why?”

Bruce suddenly looked embarrassed. He stood up, closed the door and when he spoke again, his tone was too quiet to be overheard by anyone but her.

“It’s…there have been odd coincidences lately. Nothing obvious, but with this last one, especially with you involved…” He hesitated a second before adding: “I’ve been on the scene, where you were attacked. I saw where the guy had taken the shot, got a permission to analyze the bodies in the morgue, professional courtesy and all.” Bruce was a forensic anthropologist, part-time coroner. “Those guys weren’t killed by bullets, Natasha. The injuries were disguised. It wasn’t obvious but I’ve seen these kinds of wounds before. Your savior used arrows.”

Natasha’s breath got caught in her breath and her skin paled drastically.

“Arrows?” she repeated. Bruce nodded. “But he- he’s _dead_. He’s been dead for…Maria told me herself. Sam saw him crash…”

“And trust me, if that guy’s alive, Maria will be the first in line to beat him up and Sam not far behind, pack solidarity be damned.” the man sighed and shook his hand in his messy hair. “I don’t know what to tell you. I guess Clint wasn’t the only one to use arrows,” he purposely ignored the way she flinched at the name. “But…we’re keeping an eye out, just in case. We weren’t in perfect agreement on whether you should be told, but I thought you deserved to know.”

She nodded, lips thinned into a line, but grateful nonetheless. A knock was heard outside and the door opened on the doctor and an overly worried-looking Darcy. Bruce shot Natasha a small but genuine smile.

“I’ll leave you now. But do stop by sometime, the pack will be happy to see you again. Especially Thor, since he’s returning from Norway –but you knew that already.”

She nodded noncommittally.

“I’ll think about it.”

“And take a break, you look exhausted.”

She gave him a friendly ‘mind-your-own-business-will-you’ glare and watched him leave the room. The moment Bruce was out, Darcy, Steve and Pepper bolted in –or rather Darcy did, the others just followed.

“I tried to call you all night yesterday!” the assistant blurted. “And you weren’t answering! And next thing I know, the cops are calling to say Hammer was found dead and you were barely breathing and all I could think is that I was such an idiot to let you go alone after annoying you and I’m really sorry because I totally didn’t know you had an alpha and all…” She paused and glanced at the door Bruce had just exited. “Is it him?”

“No.” Natasha replied, ignoring the wide-shocked eyes of Steve and Pepper’s surprised raised brow.

“You have an alpha?” Steve blurted in shock and disappointment. Natasha raised an eyebrow. Given his reaction, he _had_ been considering asking her to bind with him. She rolled her eyes and glanced at Pepper, the most likely to keep her feet on the ground right now.

“I should get out by tomorrow. Can you transfer my cases to someone else in the meantime? I think I’m going to take a few days off.” Natasha was suddenly grateful Bruce had left before he could hear her. She _wasn’t_ sure she _wouldn’t_ have tried to wipe off his smug grin with a fist. He had this tendency to act like an indulgent parent and shot her ‘I told you so’ looks when she followed a suggestion he made.

Darcy’s worried expression deepened.

“Natasha, are you sure you are all right? You _never_ took days off before.”

The redhead sent the assistant a blank stare.

“I’ll stop by the office tomorrow to pick up some stuff, but yes, I am fine and I really want to get some rest. I only have one high-profile case than Loki can take care of and the rest is minor stuff I can delegate to assistants anyway.” She laid back and shut her eyes, suddenly not in the mood to discuss with those she usually considered friends. She wanted to be alone right now. Bruce’s suggestion about an arrow being used against those men bothered her, and she was tired.

“Maybe we’ll see you tomorrow then,” Pepper, always the diplomatic, inputted. “Don’t overwork yourself.”

Natasha opened an eye and gave her a wry smile as they all left the room. Once the door was closed, she rolled on her side and curled into a ball and shut her eyes tightly, hoping for once she’d be dreaming of a pair of blue grey eyes and a cocky side smirk.

 

AO

 

Just like Bruce had predicted, Natasha was out in the early hours of the afternoon with only a slight headache. She took a taxi back home, spared a few minutes to shower and change clothes, and decided to return at the office to pick up a few files. Days off, in spite of what she had told the others, didn’t slow her down if she had side investigation to do. She would only be taking her time doing them now.

Natasha expected the stares when she arrived. The woman at the lobby, the guys from narcotics, the child-case specialist…but her most obvious welcome back was given by, again, Darcy. The assistant spotted her in the corridors and had burst into tears and ran to hug her tightly, apologizing again.

“Lewis,” Natasha growled, “you are embarrassing yourself.”

The brunette wiped her teary eyes and nodded. Along the way, a colleague came along and called:

“Hey Romanoff! The new guy is asking you in his office.”

She waved, telling she had heard him and decided to head there right away to be done with it. The younger woman immediately walked her to the office, partly to ensure Natasha was all right, _mostly_ to give her report on their new manager.

“They say he came with a good resume. And he is hot. But kinda dry. He threatened to fire half of the squad if they didn't put their shit together.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow. Darcy shrugged.

“Fine, he didn't say it like that, but the intention was there. Anyway you'll be fine. Steve gave him the tour and he made sure to mention you. It must be why he called you in. An omega working at this post must be a novelty. You’ll be careful, right? Especially after all that stuff with Hammer…”

“What’s his name?” Natasha interrupted. Her patience was wearing thin lately. Damn Banner and his suppositions.

“James Barnes.”

The redhead nearly dropped her bag in shock.

“James Barnes?” she repeated. “Tallish, dark haired, good-looking?”

“Yeah. You know him?” Darcy asked, a sudden glint of interest sparkling in her eye. Natasha rolled her eyes.

“If he’s the one I’m thinking of, we’ve worked together before,” Natasha replied evasively as they stopped in front of their new boss’ office. She was about to knock when Darcy caught her wrist mid-air. The redhead nearly hissed at the assistant, but held back last moment.

“Look, I know you’re strong and independent and all, but you’ll be careful right?”

The younger woman’s worry made Natasha smile slightly.

“I’m always careful” she assured with a smile and knocked at her boss’s door. A ‘come in’ later and she was inside the lion’s den. Behind the manager's desk, a man dressed in a crumpled brown suit and shirt and dark tie. His dark hair was slightly messy and long brands fell over his sharp eyes. When she closed the door behind and turned around, she faced dark, intense eyes. James Barnes smiled tightly, almost painfully.

“I was praying you weren’t _that_ Natasha Romanoff.” He said grimly. “But I guess God never liked me that much.”

Natasha crossed her arms and glared at him.

“I was told thirty seconds before entering this office,” she replied dryly and checked him out. “You don’t look out of shape.”

Barnes snorted.

“You could say so. I had a hard time getting over that omega that broke my heart two years ago.”

The redhead shut her eyes and inhaled sharply. A faint pang of guilt tightened her chest, but she chased it away. The decision she had made had been the right one, she knew it.

“Will whatever grudges you still harbor against me be a problem?” she asked, opening her eyes again and staring straight at him. “Or can I return to my desk and get to work without you looming over my back?”

“I thought you were taking a few days off.” Barnes pointed out sarcastically.

“I meant, once I return,” she amended but discreetly dug her nails in her palms. If he was trying to get a rise out of her, he would fail. Or he will have to face her full wrath, because she was having a very bad week, and hell would freeze over before she…

_Never let an alpha make you submit again._

Barnes kept staring at her silently from his seat. After twenty full seconds, he sighed heavily.

“I keep the personal out of the professional,” he said. “Don't expect personal favors or use my name to get yourself out of troubles.” Natasha’s glare informed him those warnings were unnecessary. “I will treat you professionally and expect you to do your job, nothing else.”

“Good to hear we are on the same page.” Natasha retorted dryly. “Can I leave now?”

The man ignored that last question and asked a last question:

“I heard what happened with Hammer. Will you be alright?”

The redhead sighed heavily, but recognized the genuine concern in his voice. It reminded her bitterly that he could have been a good alpha, her alpha, had she given him the chance.

“I have an overprotective pack watching over me,” she reminded him gently. “I’ll be fine.”

Barnes nodded in acknowledgment, and appeared vaguely relived and…hopeful?

“I guess there is still no chance you and I…”

The redhead gave him a small, tight smile.

“If I did, I would be disrespecting both you and him. I can’t give you what you want, James, and you won’t make me happy.” She paused and added softly: “Welcome to Murdock Corp. I’m sure you’ll do a bang up job.”

 

AO

 

_His body pressed hers down against the mattress, both were panting hard, him in anticipation, her in uneasiness. She wasn’t supposed to feel like this. She was Alexei’s. But that man, Clint, had power over her, a lot more power that her own alpha ever had. So when he growled, letting his alpha side show, she whimpered, shut her eyes and arched her back, offering her throat in submission. He nuzzled her neck, pepped kisses and small licks on the uncovered skin. Teeth grazed her lower jaw and she felt him press his hips harder against hers. She whimpered again, in fear this time. He scared her. With Alexei, she knew what to expect, how to deal with his urges and desires. But Alexei was a hot headed twenty year old, just five years older than her, and knew nothing of the world. Men his age only acted upon their own desires. This man, however, had hardness carved in his eyes. He wasn’t yet thirty, but she could tell he had seen things. And he…_

_“Mine.” He hissed and pulled up her skirt, and undid his pants. She felt his tip press against her entrance and she panicked. But he held her down, pressed his lips against hers, whispered reassuring words against her skin. And when he pushed inside, she realized how ready she actually was, how willingly her body welcomed him. His eyes never left hers as he moved with a surprising gentleness and that day, Natalia cried out in pleasure and shattered under a man as he tied the knot for the first time. She almost felt disappointed when he pulled out and rearranged both their clothes. And panic rose in her mind. She was Alexei’s omega and she had just let another alpha claim her. She couldn’t return to the Red Room if she wanted to live. Alexei would smell the shift of ownership and kill her on spot._

_“I won’t let them hurt you, omega-mine. Come with me,” He whispered when he sensed her panic. Those large, warm hands clamped around her smaller ones and pulled her up. She followed trustingly._

Natasha woke up with a start, gasping for air. Even though she was covered with sheets and blankets, she was shivering with cold sweats. She hurried out of the bed to the bathroom and turned on the shower. Without waiting for the right temperature, she undressed and stepped in. The cold water made her yelp but she forced herself to stay under it. She needed the distraction. She needed to keep her mind clear. Another dream of her past, of him, and she couldn’t stand it. It has been seven years for God’s sake! Seven years since Sam and Maria had showed up to the doorstep of her apartment and announced the news. That her alpha, that _her_ Clint, was dead.

Natasha left a pained whimper shake her body and she crouched and shriveled in the corner of her shower. Seven goddamn years she had spent trying to rebuild herself, to move on, and now Bruce of all people mentioned those arrows…

She still missed him so much it hurt. Clint had been her alpha, but he had also been kind to her and treated her with the uttermost respect. He was also fourteen years older than her and so his claim had been regarded as bordering illicit. But her former alpha Alexei, she found out later, had been a usurper, had deceived her into thinking she was his and had demanded a loyalty from her he did not rightfully deserved, so Natasha had welcomed the change and never pressed charges. And Clint…once she had been his, Clint had worked to earn her trust, had given her his, had waited until she had become loyal because she _wanted_ to, before claiming her again.

That was actually something she never forgave him for. Had he been a jerk, or less honorable with her…but no, he had to make her fall for him, and hard.

When James Barnes, sexy and charming colleague lawyer had started flirting with her; when she had started flirting back and tried to let go of Clint, she had felt guiltier than if Clint had been alive. The pack had been supportive of her moving on and James was a decent fellow and a good man. But James’ hands were not Clint’s, his touch or the looks he gave her didn’t make her melt like her former alpha’s did. And so she had broken it, told him the story and admitted she wasn’t ready to let it go yet. He had appreciated her honesty and left her alone, understanding he would never be able to compete with a ghost.

The water warmed slightly, but Natasha stopped it and stepped out of the shower.

She returned to the bed, still naked, and wrapped the covers around her body. She could pretend she was waiting for him, as he would often come home late. She would pretend he’d soon slip under the covers next to her and wrap his strong arms around her. She imagined his smile as he’d only touch bare skin, and savor her gift to him in the best ways possible. She knew she’d still be alone and untouched in the morning, but it didn’t hurt to pretend. So Natasha closed her eyes and let sleep get to her again.

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So-orry for the lateness! I'll try to stay to keep the schedule for next Sunday ^^"   
> All mistakes are mine

**To Never Submit Again**

 

**3**

 

The night had come early thanks to the cloudy sky. Natasha still wasn’t quite sure what she was doing in front of the café the pack usually gathered. They were meeting tonight, or so Bruce told her when she texted him on impulse.

She breathed in and out and pushed the entrance door. The loud chatter of the inside swallowed her whole but her gaze was immediately caught by a table in the far corner. Natasha couldn’t bite back a smile: there were Bruce, Sam, Melinda and Maria, and also Phil and his newest protégée Skye. Maria, always the observant, saw her first and waved at her to come over. She made her way through the crowd and reached them easily.

“Hey, I wasn’t sure you’d make it,” Bruce said, standing up to greet her. She gave him a quick hug and took the chair he offered, merely waving at the others. The room was crowded enough to make moving around quite hard, even for her.

Maria Hill was their female alpha and an FBI agent. Natasha had met her when Clint had brought her back to the safehouse where the operation to dismantle the Red Room was still ongoing. Phil Coulson, a reserved beta with a mean punch from the CIA, had kept an eye on her while Clint had to return to the Red Room to lead the army for the takedown. It wasn’t until much later, when she had started to trust Clint without relying on the privileged alpha/omega bound, that she had met the others. Sam Wilson, beta and air force military officer, was Clint’s partner at the time. Melinda May, another beta, worked with Maria and Bruce. Thor, a cheerful alpha Norwegian soldier, recently naturalized, had completed the pack.

And that jolly troop had been assembled by their former alpha male, Nick Fury.

Natasha had never met the man, just seen him once from afar. He had, honestly, scared her. The black leather jacket and black eyepatch and harsh voice had made her backtrack the first time. But Clint had always spoken of him with respect so she figured he couldn’t be that bad. She never had the opportunity to properly meet him afterwards though, since he died in a particularly spectacular car accident. The pack had stuck around Clint, who had always been the second strong alpha in the pack, Maria being too inexperienced and not ready to take over the lead. But today, only Maria remained.

“Sorry, traffic,” Natasha replied as she gave them an apologetic smile. Traffic _was_ a pain at this time of the day. “What did I miss?”

Skye, a twenty year old omega, looked up at her with bright eyes. She had been brought and introduced to the pack sometime last year thanks to Coulson.

“Old stories Nat,” Skye replied cheerfully. She always had stars in her eyes whenever she glanced at Natasha for some reason. “We were supposed to celebrate Thor’s return but he got stuck in a snowstorm in Europe. He won’t come back till a few days.”

“Oh, shame,” Natasha mourned. She would have actually been glad to see the tall blonde again. “How have you been?”

“Phil convinced me to be a consultant on criminal affairs.” She replied abash, as if she still didn’t realize she had agreed. “It’s an interesting job.”

A few words were exchanged after that, Natasha catching up with them all. She guiltily realized how astray she had been from them, and the guilt worsened when she noted how happy they were to see her. But after a while, she jumped on the main subject and blurted:

“So what is the whole fuss about Clint being alive?”

The table shut up. Sam glared at Bruce who merely shrugged. Maria frowned, clearly unhappy.

“Bruce told you?” she asked.

“And he was right to do so.” Natasha snapped. “Why did you think keeping this from me would be a good idea?”

Maria sat straighter and glared at her. Natasha felt the urge to lower her head overpowering, but managed somehow to keep it high.

“Do you remember how careful we needed to be the first year?” she replied deadly quiet. Natasha swallowed but kept looking straight. “Do you have any idea how much time we spent watching you destroy yourself? Do I have to remind you Boston? Madrid? Strasbourg? San Francisco? And that time in _Budapest_?”

“Budapest was an accident!” Natasha protested, but she was starting to see the point.

“And that’s just the first two years.” Maria went on, her voice calmer but her eyes still alert and flashing warnings. “If we speak of this, I want your word you won’t get your hopes up and do something stupid.”

The redhead glared at her.

“I swear I won’t try to kill myself searching for my supposedly still alivealpha still alive.” She hissed between clenched teeth. Maria looked satisfied by this and nodded towards Sam. The black man spoke up:

“A few months ago, I found by accident a file with the name of an active sniper, an agent working for an agency we collaborate with. The guy’s codename was Hawkeye.”

Natasha nodded, keeping herself from swallowing too hard. Next to her, Bruce gave her a gentle squeeze on the shoulder in support.

“I didn’t get a chance to check it out, but I’ve been listening for rumors. They say he’s an alpha male who favors arrows as a weapon. They also say he was recruited four years ago.”

“He was sent in the Eastern countries, all about high security level missions. Two weeks ago, his file was wiped out of the system and no trace of his existence was left.” Maria added. “His covers were all well constructed, we couldn’t find more. It’s the attack on your person, that guy using arrows, which tempted us into thinking he might still be alive.”

Natasha nodded again, biting back the momentary flutter in her chest. She had hoped they had a little more information. The nickname and the arrows were trademarks, but it didn’t prove anything.

“On that note, I met that girl the other day-“ Sam started, obviously trying to distract her from her disappointment. The discussion resumed to being an amiable chatter, and all matters of Clint were lost in moments.

 

TNSA

 

“Soooo, tell us, how did you met him!” Darcy exclaimed, eyes gleaming in delight.

Natasha always had busy days, always had something on her mind that was work related. Three days straight of laying around in her apartment had been driving her crazy, so when Darcy had called to lure her out for a drink -and dig about her mysterious alpha- she hadn’t cared and jumped on the opportunity.

So there she was, surrounded by Pepper and the assistant –how she had managed to drag the Pepper Potts out of her office remained a mystery, but she figured curiosity was strong enough of a motive- ready to talk about him. She had no obligation to do so, of course. But Maria’s words weighed on her mind, and she remembered feeling better after talking to James back then. So Natasha decided to go with the shot censured version. As much as she liked Darcy, she still didn’t quite trust her. The assistant was a big fan of the idea of Steve and her bounding after all.

“I met him when I was fifteen.” She started, staring at her glass intensely. “To cut the story short, I was meddling with the wrong crowd and he found me in time. We never fully bounded; he wanted to wait until I was of legal age to get official.”

Pepper raised an eyebrow as Darcy blurted:

“Why, he is that old?”

Natasha shot her a bitter smile.

“We have a fourteen years gap between us.” The brunette blinked in shock.

“That must have been bordering legal.” Pepper remarked. “An alpha isn’t supposed to bind until his omega is at least 18.”

“It never bothered me honestly,” Natasha replied with a shrug. “And he was away most of the time. He loved….” she trailed off, wondering if that piece of information was worth telling, and deciding it would make the girls curious and give them something to ponder over: “He was extremely…affectionate, in a physical way. When we started sharing a bed, he’d always want to cuddle.”

Darcy’s eyes sparkled, just like each time she found an interesting trail to investigate.

“And how was the sex?”

“Hot,” Natasha blurted without second thought, and felt her cheeks redden after that. “He…” she cleared her throat. “He was the…worshipping kind.” A vague smile grew on her face. “And he was good at it.”

And so she went, remembering bits and parts of those times that had made her happy. Darcy kept the flood of questions coming, Pepper occasionally asking something that tackled subtly his treatment of her. It didn’t bother her, knowing Pepper was just looking out for her. 

“Still, he’s kind of an asshole for leaving you behind.” The assistant said after a while –and many shots.

“He didn’t leave me behind,” Natasha hissed angrily. Darcy snorted and raised her glass for another sip.

“You talk about him at past tense and he wasn’t there when you got hurt. I’m sorry, but if _that_ is not abandon-“

Natasha’s eyes flared in her hardest glare and an unpleased growl resounded from her throat in warning at the assistant. Darcy slowly put her glass back down, turned her head and brought her collar down to bare her neck in submission. Pepper swallowed heavily.

“He _died_ at _war_.” Natasha hissed. “Don’t you _dare_ say anything about him when you know _nothing_.”

An uncomfortable silence settled at the table. The assistant was no longer smiling or digging for information. She quietly toyed with the edge of her glass, not quite daring to look up anymore. After a full minute, during which Natasha didn’t stop glowering, Darcy cracked and bid her goodbye. The redhead followed her every move till she exited in the street, and only then she allowed herself to relax. Perhaps she was overreacting –Darcy had always been a bit too probing –but she was on edge lately. Perhaps Bruce telling her about the pack's suspicions hadn’t been such a good idea after all.

“No wonder why people think you are an alpha,” Pepper said uneasily. Natasha could tell she was this close to leave too. “You put some alphas’ intimidation growl at shame.”

“Clint demanded that I wouldn’t let anyone step on my feet, not even alphas, and even less him,” she replied with a shrug. She noted Pepper didn’t ask who ‘Clint’ was, immediately assuming –and rightfully so –that he was the alpha. “He also said I better get myself an education and a job, because he’d be damned if he financed my lifestyle.”

“Again, no wonder why you are so independent,” Pepper muttered. “And he was supportive all the way?”

“He died before my graduation, so he never knew what I decided to be.” she replied bitterly. “But I think he would have challenged me to be the youngest Federal Judge in History. Something about my stubbornness wearing my adversaries out.” She added with a sad smile. “He loved teasing me, but he respected me.”

Pepper gave her another long, calculating look.

“How long exactly, were you two alpha and omega?”

“Couple years, barely. From my fifteens to eighteens. He was…” her voice trailed off. “We had hard times, but we were working. We had each other’s back. I don’t think I’ll ever find anyone like him.” she gave Pepper a half smile. “I don’t think I want to replace him.”

“You’ve chosen a rather lonely life then.” The strawberry blonde remarked pensively.

“I’m not alone, I have my pack.” She replied, electing another surprised blink from her colleague and friend. “Actually, they were his pack, but they adopted me along the way.”

“You are legally registered?” Pepper asked curiously. Packs were rare nowadays, because of the change of mentalities and how hard it was to control them. Pack rules were strict, but also offered a certain degree of protection. No wonder why, in Pepper’s mind, that Natasha never looked too hard for a companion. She probably had one or two other alphas and quite a few more betas to back her up.

“It’s complicated.” She replied softly and checked her watch. “I have to go Pepper, but thank you for coming.”

The alpha female nodded and waved goodbye as she left the bar.

It was far later in the evening than she expected, Natasha realized when she face cool air and the dark sky. Probably around nine thirty, or ten. She had walked to the bar, since she didn’t live that far away, and had suspected she’d take quite a few glasses in between. Which was probably the reason why she didn’t notice right away she was being shadowed. The streets were empty of course, aside from a bum or two.

Twice in a week is annoying, she thought, already picturing her pack’s disbelief –she had a tendency to get kidnapped, but still. But this time, she was ready. She didn’t pick up the pace but sent a global S.O.S text to her pack, hoping they were still around. Maria replied first: _‘In 5’_. Five minutes were a lot, but less than she expected. Then again, Maria tended to work overnight not too far away. Bruce soon followed with a regrettable: ‘ _Airport for Thor._ ’ So he wouldn’t be of any help. So wouldn’t be Phil, whom she knew would be in Amsterdam and May someplace in Brooklyn. She was about to put her phone back when Sam sent: _‘Other side of town. Coming ASAP.’_ Other side of town was vast. But at least Maria did say she’d be there soon. All Natasha had to do was-

Someone brutally caught her arm and pulled her into a nearby alley. Before the redhead could scream for help, he covered her mouth with his hand and hissed a soft: ‘ _quiet’_.

Natasha opened her mouth underneath his hand to bite him when…

A smell, all too rich and all too powerful hit her like a wave and she froze, mouth opened wide in shock. The face of the man pinning her was barely lightened by the nearest lamppost, but her eyes met familiar blue-grey ones and her heart skipped a beat. He retrieved his hand but the urge to scream had deserted her.

“Clint?” she whispered in shock. Fingers slipped in her hair, brought her face closer and warm lips closed over her mouth.

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting this new chapter today because I won't have the opportunity tomorrow.  
> Un-beta-ed work, so all mistakes are mine :)

**To Never Submit Again**

**4**

 

Years of practice of rejecting alphas kicked in and she kneed the man in the balls. He stepped back cursing and she immediately felt guilty.

“I’m sorry,” Natasha blurted, but she didn’t step closer to check on him. She didn’t push away the possibility she had mistaken his features, that the desire to see him again had troubled her. But when he straightened, it was his face and eyes that stared back at her. A little bit older, a bit more tired, but still alert.

“I knew I wouldn’t be welcomed,” he muttered sarcastically, “but I didn’t expect it to be so bad.”

It was his voice. It was his scent. Natasha cautiously approached him this time. He leaned back against the wall, his body language more reserved. Natasha bit her lower lip, raised her hand and brushed his cheek.

“That really you?” she asked, and immediately hated the vulnerability in her voice. Clint closed his eyes and sighed as he leaned into her touch.

“I’m sorry Tasha,” his fingers wrapped around her wrist and he moved her hand to drop a small kiss in her palm. She felt a shiver ran down her spine. “I just saw you and I…” with his free hand, he made a vague motion. “I just couldn’t-”

Natasha didn’t let him finish, stepped forwards and kissed him hard. There were issues to deal with later, but right now she wanted nothing more but make sure he was real. Clint got the hint, wrapped his arms around her waist and pinned her back against the wall again.

She lost touch with reality, melting in his embrace, a hand holding tight on his jacket while the other ran through in his hair, her body flushed against him. Their lips moved together in a painfully and deliciously slow motion. A low growl erupted from his throat. Natasha whimpered and turned her face away, offering her throat in submission. Again he kissed her there, gently but insistently. Seven years ago his touch had been addicting. She realized time had made the craving increase and now she could barely breathe, could barely move, could barely _think_ as long as he stood there and…

“ _Sonovabitch_!”

Clint was violently yanked away from her embrace and thrown further down the road. Natasha cowered at the sudden loss and nearly ran after him to recover it. But another hand, a friendly hand (but not Clint’s) prevented her from doing so.

“You okay Nat?” Sam asked worriedly. In the background, she could see Maria facing Clint with a blank, cold and furious expression she had never seen before. She suddenly dashed at him and hit him square in the jaw. The hit was strong enough to send him down. Natasha’s omega instinct roared in protest.

“Stop it!” she shouted and ran towards her fallen alpha to kneel next to him and shield him from the others. But Maria wasn’t done.

“I knew it! You were still alive _Hawkeye_ , and you didn’t even bother inform your own _pack_ of that detail?”

Clint held onto Natasha to stand up and stared at the ground, in surprising meekness.

“Can’t it wait for another day?” he asked, his voice barely louder than a whisper. “I know I owe you all an apology and explanation,” Maria snorted and Sam looked ready to demand one now. “But it’s classified information. National Security,” he added on a firmer tone. Both Sam and Maria were _this_ close to protest, so he offered a compromise: “Reunite the pack and I’ll explain everything. Is tomorrow night a good time?”

“And you won’t skip it?”

“He’ll be there,” Natasha replied for him, earning a half-felt glare. “I’ll make sure he attends.”

“Natasha, are you certain?” Maria asked between clenched teeth. Natasha had no doubt she suspected she might allow her alpha to escape if he wanted to.

The redhead stared at the - _her_ alpha in the eye. Her whole being wanted him to come to her, to scoop her in his arms, to hold her hand like he had done before and drive her to safety. But…

_Never submit._

She breathed in deeply and nodded.

“He owes the pack an explanation.” She replied simply. “You and I both know he isn’t going to deny his responsibility. And you would come after him anyway if he didn’t,” she added with a humorless smile.

Clint didn’t say a word to confirm or deny, but Natasha knew he’d follow her instructions. Maria knew that too, so all she did was sighing and send a look at Sam to cut off any protest he would have made.

“Tomorrow, 7 pm, join us at the usual safehouse. Nat knows which one.”

This time, Clint nodded his agreement.

“So I assume he’s staying with you?” Maria asked, eyeing Natasha.

The redhead glanced at Clint.

“It’s up to her,” he replied with a shrug. Natasha felt something twisting in her stomach, quite like anticipation.

“He will.” She replied, avoiding all their gazes. She figured they all assumed she just wanted him back in her bed, and they weren’t wrong.

“It’s settled then.” Maria concluded and Sam sent one last glance to the omega. Natasha nodded, silently assuring him she’d be fine. Clint wouldn’t take advantage of her and if anything happened, it would be consensual. Still, she felt warm at the idea the man would go against his former alpha if anything went wrong.

 

TNSA

 

They arrived at her place too soon. Clint stepped inside her  apartment, her sanctuary, and looked around. Natasha was suddenly glad she had cleaned up everything the previous day and felt nervous. She had no reason to, but what if he didn’t like it? 

“It’s nice,” he eventually said with a smile. “It suits you.”

The words made her cheeks redden involuntarily. Back then, a mere compliment made her flush easily. It seemed some things never changed. And she could never resist that smile.

“I –uh –I only have one bed.” She said, staring consciously at the floor.

“It’s fine, I can take the couch,” he replied. Natasha felt a light pang in her chest, not unlike disappointment. Clint felt it too.

“You know what’s likely to happen if I follow you in there.” He said, his voice deeper and huskier than she remembered. His eyes were so intense, as if he could see through her. Natasha swallowed and nodded. She didn’t want to admit out loud that was exactly what she wanted.

His pupils had widened and darkened, and she suddenly couldn’t breathe anymore. He whispered her name, his fingers lingering over her face, her cheeks, her lips, her jaw, then down her neck. Natasha closed her eyes and tilted her head back. His hands were now ghosting over her collarbone and toying with the edge of her shirt.

The deep growl was back. _Mine_. She barred her throat to him. No matter what he had said about her not submitting to alphas, he was probably the only one she would never fight against. Gentle hands sized her hips, his mouth sucked the skin below her ear again. His hips mimicked a rocking motion and she felt him harden. A weak whine escaped her parted lips as her body replied and arousal built at the pit of her stomach. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulled him closer for a heated kiss. When they parted, he whispered:

“Where is your bedroom, omega-mine?”

She took his hand and wordlessly led him there. Clothes were shred, covers laid aside. Natasha let herself fall back and waited for him to join her. Clint settled between her thighs fast enough and with one last kiss, he pushed inside. She gasped as he slipped past her barriers, reeling in the feeling of her alpha claiming her. Her eyelids shut at the old, pleasurable sensation of her body being overtaken. It had been so long since he’d –since _anyone_ had last touched her, so long since she’d felt him moving and his weight pinning her down. She focused on his pants, his groans, recorded every gasp without noticing she made the same noises. He swallowed her moans when she came, soon followed her with a grunt, and an intense expression on his face she watched with fascination.

Afterwards he simply lay besides her and cupped her cheek, they bodies inches away from each other.

“You are even more beautiful than in my memories.” he whispered. The compliment made Natasha shiver in content and she parted her legs eagerly when he rolled on top of her again.

 

TNSA

 

She woke up nearly incapable of moving. Her limbs weighed tons and her mind was clouded not unlike the remains of a heat wave. Unfortunately, her cell phone rang and duty urged her to pick up; which she did by some miracle.

“Romanoff” she grumbled half-sleepily.

_“Natasha! Where the hell are you?”_

Darcy’s high-pitched voice hurt her ears and made Natasha cringed. That was not what she needed right now.

“Darcy, when I said day off…” A faint noise in the background made her look up. Clint stood in the doorframe, dressed with a pair of jeans and a sleeveless shirt. His hair looked like birds’ nest and his eyes had circles underneath but the glint of mischief that had been there all night had remained. Natasha didn’t know if she wanted to slap or kiss the man right now. “…I mean it. It’s far too early for this.”

_“Early? Early? It’s past ten! Are you alright?”_ Darcy sounded worried now.

“Yeah,” she muttered. “Why are you calling?”

_“I wanted to apologize for yesterday,_ ” she replied, the tone of her voice clearly upset. _“I know it’s hard for you lately and I’m not helping-“_

“Go figure,” Natasha muttered as Clint waited and watched from the threshold.

_“But I’m really worried for you. Seriously, you should take better care of yourself.”_

Natasha rolled her eyes in annoyance.

“Yeah, whatever. I’ll see you when I get back.” She said and hung up.

She let her head fall back on the pillow. As if it had been a signal, Barton stepped closer and stopped at the edge of the bed. He sat right next to her and brought a hand to brush her cheek.

“You look tired,” he stated. Natasha rolled on her side to face him but didn’t get up. She could barely move thanks to arches all over her body.

“You kinda fucked me all night long” she pointed out. “I’m allowed to.”

Clint laughed and leaned forwards to give her a kiss. She allowed it, feeling her whole body purring at the attention. She had always loved when he took extra care of her. The kiss became deeper and rougher and soon enough she was on her back, head thrown back, panting hard and hands clinging to her sheets and Clint stuck between her legs and eating her out. Back in the days their lovemaking had always been passionate, no matter how slow, fast, rough or gentle. A round never failed to let her satisfied with the world and humming with pleasure and it seemed Barton hadn’t forgotten how to make her body sing.

Needless to say, a small part of her couldn’t _wait_ to reach her heat cycle. Their sessions then were _fantastic_.

When she finally could move again, he brought her breakfast in bed. Natasha ate nearly everything –for all the good it brought, bed sports with Clint had always been _exhausting_ \- and once she was done, he climbed behind her, bent her leg so her ass would be vaguely elevated and pressed his tip against her entrance. Natasha just closed her eyes and braced herself for what was coming.

She would usually hate feeling so vulnerable, so exposed. But his hands were always gentle, his eyes caring and he took his time and made sure she got her share of pleasure. She wasn’t ashamed of the sharp pants and whimpers and moans that came out of her mouth when he pounded into her, she wasn’t ashamed of the way she clang to the sheets, buried her head in his pillow to smother her cries. She didn’t care about the way she begged when she couldn’t take anymore, or when her whole body shook in the aftermath of her late orgasm. And she certainly didn’t give a damn when Clint pulled her against him in a warm cuddle and kept whispering sweet words until she fell asleep again.


	5. Chapter 5

**To Never Submit Again**

**4**

 

Natasha woke up alone.

She opened her eyelids, blinked to chase the remains of sleep. Her whole body arched in a way it hadn’t in years and a foreign scent lingered on her sheets. Those were the only signs that assured her she hadn’t been dreaming. That, and the faint sound of the shower running.

Natasha picked up a discarded shirt and headed to the bathroom, her heart beating so hard it hurt her ribcage. The water stopped running and she heard someone –hopefully Clint–step out and wrap himself in a towel. The door was shut, either for privacy or to prevent her from hearing him, so she gave a light knock before opening it.

“Hel-“

It was Clint all right, turning his back to her. Upon hearing her he turned around, but Natasha didn’t pay much attention to him; she was much more interested on what she saw on his skin. Webs of scars, each more or less deep, more or less long, were marring his chest and plunging under his towel. She suddenly realized she had never seen his naked torso in broad daylight. The night had hidden everything and earlier he had kept his shirt on.

“What in the world happened to you?” she asked, fascinated by the injuries. She had seen enough wounds to guess what had been used on his to cause them. Most were given by a blade, a few were bullet wounds. A flower-shaped one on his ribs was unmistakably ones of electric torture. One thought concluded it all: he must have suffered for each and every one of them.

Clint looked away, as if ashamed. Natasha stepped closer and caught his chin in her hand, inciting him to look back at her.

“Clint…”

“That’s what kept me away,” he said suddenly, his voice grave and the corner of his mouth tight. “You see what they did to me,” he gestured over his whole body. “Had they known you existed, they would have done the same to you.”

Natasha stared at him, really stared at him. The previous night, too overwhelmed by the idea of his return, she hadn’t realized how tired he looked. Wrinkles that hadn’t been there, the hard line at the corner of his mouth…she suddenly felt the urge to wrap him in her arms and never let him go.

“Tell me.” She ordered as gently as she could muster. He needed to talk, that much she easily realized, but he needed to talk in private before exposing the whole story to the pack. They wouldn’t see the scars right away; they would only see a deserter.

“Let me get dressed first.” Clint replied. “I’ll join you in the living-room.”

“Don’t close up on me,” Natasha warned before leaving. “I’m on your side.”

He flashed her a small, knowing, grateful smile. She left the room and returned to put a few more clothes herself. When she returned, he was waiting on her couch, well dressed and freshly shaved. She shivered at his scent, but sat next to him and waited for him to start. Clint tentatively reached out for her hand. Natasha went ahead took his in between hers. Their eyes met and she gave him a small encouraging nod.

“Sam did see me crash,” he started, and by the tone of his voice, the memories were still fresh and harsh to live through again. “But I survived, barely, but luckily enough, whole. The rebels thought they could extract information for me, so they kept me underground for a while. I tried to escape about…five, six times? Then I got stuck in a group of hostages held by a gang named the Ring. Among those prisoners, there was that guy you must have heard of, Tony Stark.”

“The billionaire?” Natasha asked with raised eyebrows. She remembered the case having occurred a few years ago.

“The asshat himself. He escaped with his armor, which everyone knows about now, and we made it to…” he hesitated. “I think it was Morocco. An underground organization picked us up from there and…” he shrugged. “The Ring knew our faces. Stark blew up half of it, but the organization asked me if I wanted to give them a hand in hunting the rest down. I was a war prisoner for three years, back in shape in six months. The last member of the Ring was arrested two weeks ago.”

“So Maria was right,” she wondered out loud. “You were the secret operative codenamed Hawkeye.”

He cupped her cheeks.

“I would have never forgiven myself if you got hurt because of me.” He whispered, his voice raw with emotion. “Maybe I did it the wrong way, but…if it meant you and the pack were safe, then I would do it again.”

Natasha inhaled sharply.

“I just wished you’d trust me enough to tell me.” She muttered. “I went through hell after you disappeared.”

“First few years weren’t quite my fault.” He pointed out with a humorless smile. His face became serious again. “Don’t think I didn’t suffer from your absence. To become Hawkeye, I had to forget about you all. I had to put the pack behind and become a true soldier again.” He cupped kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose, her mouth and every other spare place on her face. Natasha closed her eyes. She couldn’t care less if it made her look weak, but she couldn’t be angry at him. She wanted him back, plain and simple. “The moment they were completely torn apart, I returned to you. I watched you for a couple days. It wasn’t until Hammer kidnapped you that I realized I should have made my move sooner.” He smiled briefly. “You’re playing dangerous games, omega-mine.”

“I didn’t care anymore.” Natasha replied, and her voice was so _quiet_. “You weren’t there. I wanted to die to return to you. The pack kept me alive till I decided I needed to give them a break and get a grip and climb out of the hole I was digging for myself.” She pulled out of his hands but wrapped her arms around his neck to bring him for a kiss. “You saved me. You gave me my life back. You were my goddamn _alpha_. How would you feel if I vanished one day, and someone came to knock on the door to say I died in duty?” Her fingers caressed his scalp. He always had soft hair. “I nearly killed myself three times that week. I drove Maria crazy with my suicide attempts. Bruce, Melinda and Sam didn’t leave my side for weeks.”

“Natasha, don’t-” he suddenly started. His eyes were narrowed in pain and anger and guilt, but Natasha didn’t want him off the hook so easily.

“You made me go through a lot,” she interrupted. “I expect you to use the rest of your life making it up to me.”

Clint smiled briefly.

“You are more of an alpha than an omega, Tasha. You always were.”

The redhead snorted.

“You are the one who gave me the order to never submit. It’s entirely your fault.”

“And I wouldn’t change that for the world.”

Natasha shut her eyes, suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to cry. He pulled her into a tight hug and she knew by the way his hands dug into her back that he would never let her go again.

 

* * *

  
 

The pack’s welcome was as cold as she expected. Bruce and Sam were unnerved by his presence; Phil and Melinda blank –which usually meant pissed. Maria was doing her best to not grit her teeth. The only people who looked happy to see him were Thor (but Thor was always thrilled at the sight of a friend) and Skye, who had heard about him but never met him properly.

Natasha guided him to the living room and waited for Maria’s instructions; although Clint was her alpha, she had sworn her loyalty to the pack and this house was Maria’s territory. Clint was no longer their leader, he had to obey as well.

“Take the loveseat.” She ordered, probably to encourage Natasha to sit beside him. The rest of the pack settled in their usual place and waited expectantly. Maria waited until everyone was seated to take her own, a large red single couch. “Start talking.”

Clint inhaled sharply.

“Everything I say stays in this room,” he announced, eyeing each of them before setting on Maria. Natasha had always compared her to a queen, from the way she sat on that red couch like a throne. As long as she kept being efficient, the redhead didn’t mind, even found it amusing and suiting her.

“You have my word.” The alpha eventually replied, and the rest of the pack nodded in approval.

So Clint started. He talked about the last mission with Sam, how his metal wings were hit by a stray missile, how he crashed and was buried under a bunch of metal and only survived because his wings had mechanically folded over him. He told them about the Ring, the torture and the months of captivity, the attempted escapes –and failures. Then he described what he called the Stark Escape, the organization that recruited him, put him back in shape and sent him after the Ring. He mentioned the various missions after the Ring all over the world, the last man to go down and his prompt return to New York, his taking down of Hammer, his stalking (and Natasha actually snickered at the disbelieved stares of the pack, and the light blush on his cheeks).

No-one dared to interrupt him, and Natasha held his hand all along.

“I am not intending to challenge you to take back the alpha lead,” he ended for Maria. “But I was kinda hoping you wouldn’t banish me.”

During his confessions, the stares had become less hostile and more compassionate. Natasha knew the feeling of betrayal had faded into something else, and the tension that had previously reigned in the room had slowly vanished. Maria glanced at the pack and returned her attention on him.

“I think I speak for everyone when I say while you’re not entirely forgiven, but the door isn’t closed on you.” She let the agreement run through with the others and apparently interpreted something from his silence. “But you have another request to make.”

Clint nodded sheepishly.

“I would like to present a new candidate for the pack.” He murmured. Natasha glanced sideways at him in slight surprise; he hadn’t mentioned that to her. “He’s a beta, had been a loner for a while but I know he’s been longing to belong somewhere.”

The rest of the pack exchanged glances. Maria didn’t even blink.

“Where did you meet him?”

“During my captivity with the Ring.” He replied evenly. “He helped me out later when I became Hawkeye. I never mentioned the pack to him, but he saw the Eagle.” The tattoo indicating he belonged to one. Most of the pack made an unconscious –protective- move towards their own. Natasha’s was engraved on her shoulder blade. Clint was on display on his upper arm. She knew Bruce’s and Skye’s were on their shoulder blade too, Sam’s the left forearm, Melinda’s the right ankle, Phil’s no-one knew, and Thor’s on his right pectoral. Maria’s was on her lower back. Fury’s had been on his chest.

“And what is the fellow’s name?” Sam asked. Maria raised an eyebrow at him in warning. He lowered his head, knowing he shouldn’t have spoken.

Clint tensed slightly, and Natasha knew immediately the candidate was a well-known and ill-loved character.

“Stark. Tony Stark.”

 

* * *

  
 

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done!” Natasha exploded when she slammed the door of her apartment behind her. “Tony Stark of all people? That guy is a living nightmare!”

She had dealt with him on a case as a moral support for Pepper. It had been a near miracle she hadn’t punched the billionaire in the face after two hours. The pack had busted into protests, but Maria had cut a compromise; she and Clint would visit Stark and after that, she would make her decision.

“The guy saved my life Tasha, more than once.” He replied, barking back at her. “I actually like him, and I think you could like him too.”

“That is not happening.”

“Tasha, please listen to-“

They both stilled as a new scent rose in the room. Natasha hadn’t bothered checking the calendar, and she was quite certain her heat cycle was not to begin until the next week. So when the desire unexpectedly crashed through her body, Natasha had to brace herself against the nearest wall to stand straight. Clint’s pupils doubled in volume and his voice grew grave and husky.

“You…”

Natasha whimpered and bared her throat. Her anger was washed away as her alpha stepped forwards, wrapped his arms around her and kissed her breath away.

“We will talk later,” Natasha hissed when he pulled back. “Don’t think you are out of the woods yet.”

“Anything you want dear,” Clint replied and promptly tore her clothes before carrying her to the bedroom.

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am somehow managing to keep a proper schedule for this fic. First time ever o.O
> 
> For those who like Steve...sorry, I'm not a big fan of his. And this chapter earns the story's warning. Nothing too explicit though, I think.

**To Never Submit Again**

**6**

 

As far as Natasha remembered, her heats had always been strong and painful. At first, she had put the blame on Alexei and his tendency to be a lot more brutal than usual during her cycles. But then, when in Clint’s care, even the suppressant shots didn’t quite repressed the dull arch in her lower stomach. She tried to take as many days off as she could or mask her smell when she was at the office. But when she couldn’t hold back, when too many suppressants became dangerous after a while, when she needed to let the heat take over, she would curl into a ball and whimper for hours, incapable of moving. It wasn’t until Clint tied the knot for the first time that she truly realized how much she needed an alpha to calm her heats.

“Tasha,” he whispered against his skin, already sliding inside her without preamble.

The sudden invasion made her tense and stop breathing. They had been relearning each other the past night –was it only a day since he’d reappear- and yet she still needed to get reacquainted with that side of him. Clint’s body was all muscles, especially those arms that could hurt her unintentionally, and he wasn’t gentle. When she was in heat, he had admitted he could never quite control himself. But this was how Natasha preferred him, taking everything she had to offer and more. He did no exception here, slamming his hips so hard she’d moan and pant and sputter his name, clinging to his shoulders. The need to have him close, to feel his weight pinning her, his teeth biting her collarbone when she made a move he disapproved of, sucking her breasts when she did something he liked…it all returned at once and it became too much to bear.

Natasha felt thrown back years back, when she first willingly invited him to her bed, trembling with need and sweat and longing for his hands on her. She briefly remembered the insecurity, the fear of not being good enough, of being hurt by the man she had decided to trust, and eventually, the relief when he turned out to be so much more.

And then she couldn’t think anymore, just feel, as the alpha she had chosen rammed into her in the most caveman display she had ever seen from him. The feral expression on his face tipped her off. Natasha threw her head back, eyes shut tight and mouth opened by a throaty scream. Clint kept moving and kissing her exposed throat while she rode through, fell limp and boneless on the mattress and on the verge of passing out. A few thrusts later, she felt him enlarge inside and him growling in her neck.

The release was pleasant and filling and she sighed in content. Clint pulled out and fell by her side. Natasha rolled to cuddle him, eager to rest against his warmth again. His breathing eventually eased as he fell into slumber. She smiled.

“Sweet dreams, alpha-mine,” she whispered before kissing his cheek and following him to dreamland.

 

* * *

 

Natasha was brought out of a dreamless sleep by Clint leaving the bed.

“Sleep,” he told her, his fingers spread flat between her shoulder blades to keep her down. The large, rough, warm hand soothed her immediately. Sometimes during the night, she had ended on her stomach. She blamed it on too many nights spent alone. “I won’t be long.”

To show her disapproval, Natasha grumbled something in her pillow and tried to glare at him through sleepy eyes.

“I will wake you up properly when I come back,” he promised. This time she reluctantly hummed and sighed when he kissed the top of her shoulder and got out of bed. She curled into the warmish spot he left behind, inhaled his scent and relaxed again, ready to fall back to sleep.

She had been dozing off for twenty minutes or so when someone knocked at her door. Natasha frowned, slowly turned to the side and looked around. Clint was obviously not home yet, but she dismissed the option of him being the one knocking. She rolled off the bed with a muttered curse, slipped on a discarded shirt –his shirt- and a pair of leggings hanging around before heading to the door. A quick glance through the peeping hole and she opened the door reluctantly.

“You know,” Natasha started, drawing tiredly every syllable out of her mouth, “When I say I’m taking my week off, I am taking my week off.” She gave Steve a hard glare and added: “I hope you have a pretty goddamn reason for showing up now.”

Steve was, she suddenly realized with dread, holding a bunch of flowers and a box of chocolates. She nearly banged her head against the door in desperation. Darcy must have tried to play matchmaker again.

“This is just a get better gift, since I missed you at work.” The blonde man tried to argue, cheeks flushing brightly. He paused then, probably smelling she was just getting down a heat, and frowned at the sight of the T-shirt. “Are you all right?”

“Could be better,” she went on, clearly signaling she considered his presence more of a bother than anything else, a signal he was clearly ignoring, much to her annoyance. “You’ve seen me, I’m fine. Now leave.”

She attempted to slam the door, but he was faster. His foot stuck in the entrance, he forced his way in and shut the door behind. Natasha took a few steps back, but Steve dropped his bouquet and the box on the floor and caught her wrists awkwardly.

“Let me _go_!” she hissed, glaring at him.

“Listen Natasha,” Steve started, his eyes darkening and his breath shaky. Natasha struggled out of his grip, trying to kick him away. She could smell his alpha instincts taking over. “You might be angry at me right now but later you’ll thank me.” He pushed her against the wall, using his whole strength to immobilize her. “You can’t keep going unbounded, you need protection.”

She kept struggling and trying to shove him off, but Steve was stronger physically and didn’t need his natural authority to hold her down. He tried to sooth her by kissing her, but she only fought harder. After she harshly bit his forearm to blood, Steve growled and, holding her wrists in one hand, used the other to pull down her leggings.

The movement made Natasha freeze in shock. And then she trashed and bucked and did everything she could to throw him off.

“ _CLINT_!” she screamed, terrified. _“CLINT! HELP ME!_ ”

“Your alpha is dead,” Steve mumbled as he unzipped his pants one-handed. Natasha was still struggling and he had to admit he was impressed and uneasy with her resistance. But this was for her own good, he reminded himself. If she was his omega, no-one would dare approach her. “And I promise I will take care of you.”

He tried to position himself, but she was still moving too much for a proper knotting. In an old military reflex, he pressed his hand against her throat, stopping her from breathing correctly. She still struggled, but it was weaker now and her eyes were starting to be unfocused and vague. Still keeping his hand in place, he parted her legs and pressed his tip to her entrance.

And was harshly yanked back from behind.

Steve barely had the time to blink. One moment, he was holding Natasha down and trying to tie her to him; the next, someone had grabbed his collar and sent him flying back across the room and crash into furniture.

_“_ What the _fuck_ do you _think_ you’re _doing?”_ a very pissed off, very dark, very alpha voice growled at him.

Steve blinked hard to get his senses back, but he was destabilized again when the same person hauled him up effortlessly, and shoved him against the nearest wall. Steve’s head made an awful _crack_ and his fell on his side, pants still hanging open. When he raised his eyes to meet the newcomer’s, he encountered a blue-grey shade burning with anger. The man himself was probably smaller than him in height, but the fury coming out in waves from his body made him a lot taller. His face was contused in a snarl, his teeth showing, eyes narrowed and zeroed on him.

_“You keep your fucking hands off my omega!”_ the man howled, his throat making an odd growling and threatening noise. Steve’s alpha instinct was torn between standing back and submitting, but he didn’t dare move. He didn’t understand what was happening. He had been told Natasha’s alpha was dead! But the stranger was there, a firm barrier between him and the omega. Said omega was now curled into a ball, eyeing the scene –and eyeing him –with a terrified expressions. Without leaving Steve out of his sight, the man backed up towards Natasha and brushed her arm. The woman grabbed his hand eagerly like a child seeking for comfort.

“Go to the bedroom,” the stranger ordered gently. Natasha stood trembling on her legs and nearly ran out of the room without glancing at Steve.

Steve swallowed, realizing by the way the omega had reacted and how protective and dangerous he showed himself to be, that the man could only be Natasha’s mate.

“It’s a misunderstanding.” He started, hoping he could convince the alpha this was just a terrible mistake. He just wanted Natasha safe. He was respected, he could offer her that kind of protection. But the other man’s eyes hardened.

“I think there is little misunderstanding in what I saw.” The man growled and stepped closer. Steve inspected him quickly: bulk torso, powerful arms, hard eyes, so a man used to hardships of life and used to fight to get his way. It didn’t surprise him that Natasha would have a strong alpha. “Now you and I need to have a little talk.” He added, cracking his knuckles together in a very distinctive manner.

 

* * *

 

Natasha heard the fight outside. She heard the hits and groans and the crashing of bodies, and she heard the door open, a last yell and warning from Clint and the door slamming back again. She had no doubt about who would win. Steve might be a good fighter, but Clint had much more training –and he had her to protect. Still, she couldn’t help but shiver in anger and fear when she saw him return, his face a little bruised and a trail of blood in his mouth. Anger, because Steve had betrayed her trust and dared to fight back, fear, because she couldn’t predict how Clint would react towards _her_.

She had opened her door to Steve in the end, and he was bearing gifts for her. She hoped, truly hoped, that Clint would understand.

“I didn’t want him,” she babbled immediately, unable to face him in the eye. Her whole body was trembling, terrified at the thought he might turn his back on her. “I swear Clint, I didn’t want him.”

Clint brushed her protests aside and engulfed her in a tight embrace. Natasha clung to him, breathing into his chest, feeling his heartbeat against her cheek. She could feel his anger, but not directed towards her.

“I know,” he whispered and she relaxed slightly and clenched her fists in the fabric of his shirt tighter. “I could smell your fear, omega-mine.” His hand dug in her hair, tipped her head back and he leaned forwards for a gentle, yet possessive, kiss. “He won’t come back.”

Natasha parted her lips, silently seeking for another reassurance. Clint brushed her mouth a few times, giving her gentle pecks and nibs. When he deemed her appeased, he released her.

“Return to bed, I’ll be there in a minute.”

He brought back the pastries he had been off to buy, along with some orange juice. He then set the plate and drinks on the bed, slid behind her and urged her to eat with her back against his chest and his arms possessively wrapped around her waist. After the late breakfast, they stayed in bed but Clint didn’t try to claim her again. He just held her, her face in his chest and his chin over her head, hands tracing patterns over her back through her shirt.

“You’ve done a bang up job resisting alphas so far,” he eventually said. Natasha didn’t know if this was a compliment or a wary remark. She pulled out of his embrace and stared at him. He had this impassive face, when in deep thoughts. She couldn’t tell what was going through his mind.

“I only have one alpha. And I will always only recognized one. Had Steve…” her voice trailed off. “Had he done what he was about to do, I would have done everything to break tie with him.”

“Even if I wasn’t in the picture?”

Natasha returned to her previous spot, tight against his chest, face nuzzling his neck.

“There was that one alpha that I was interested in.” she admitted and felt him tense. “I met him on a case, a few years ago. Maria even met him, and approved of him. He was a good man, and I know he would have treated me right. But when he offered, I refused and told him about you, that I wasn’t ready to move on. He respected my choice.” She pulled back again and looked in his eyes. “He _respected_ my choice.” She repeated. “And for that alone, I liked him. Had you not reappeared, and had he asked again in a few years, I would have said yes.”

Clint’s grip on her became more forceful, but it didn’t scare her.

“I can’t blame you,” he eventually said. “I was gone for a long time. You thought I was dead.” He swallowed heavily. “I just hate the idea of you with someone else. And you are so independent…that guy didn’t even smell me on you.”

A small part of her felt annoyed at these words, blatant example of an alpha’s possessiveness. Another part of her, incredibly amused; because she kinda liked when he became possessive. She pushed him on his back and straddled his hips. His hands automatically came over her waist to steady her.

“And am I too much of an _alpha_ for you?” Natasha purred, trailing her fingers down his chest. He caught the wandering hand and brought it to his mouth to kiss its palm.

“I want us to be officially recognized.” He admitted, and she froze. “I was waiting till your graduation to ask you. Nothing has to change; you can keep your job while I have mine. I don’t want _anyone_ to believe they might have a chance with you while I’m around here.” his hands tightened around her wrist. “I want you to be mine, just mine. And I don’t want what happened with…Steve, that’s the name?-happen again.”

It took her a few moments to find her voice again, and another realization to sink in.

“Would you have killed him?” Natasha asked quietly. “Like you killed Hammer and his associates?”

Clint’s answer was definite and sharp.

“What he did was attempted rape, and right in front of your own alpha. I would have been _entitled_ to kill him with my _bare_ hands. And I will do it if he lays his eyes on you again.” He added, his voice lowered and his fingers digging in her hip. There would be traces over her skin, but she didn’t mind.

“Are you going to tell the pack?”

“I’ll call them later.” Clint confirmed. Natasha opened her mouth to protest, but he cut her sharply: “They need to know, Tasha. That’s what a pack is for. They will protect you if I can’t. I heard they hadn’t done such a bad job so far.” His hand cupped her cheek “And about the binding…I’m not asking you to say yes right away. Just…think about it, please. That’s all I’m asking for.”

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I guess I jinxed myself with the last AN ^^" Anyway, this story has 3 chapters left, and the two others are partially written. I'm back to one chapter per week on Sunday :)  
> Un-beta-ed work, so all mistakes are mine.

**To Never Submit Again**

**7**

 

They didn’t mention his words the rest of the day. Everything went quietly, with Clint offering to cook, Natasha doing the laundry, and an uneventful evening. They exchanged a few kisses, cuddled in front of TV and went to bed without a fuss. It felt as if the marathon sex of the previous day had calmed their ardor, and they were settling for a calmer moment.

That was, until Clint started trashing in the middle of the night and woke her up from a blissful sleep.

He was grunting and whimpering at the same time, and Natasha knew enough to recognize a very bad nightmare. Although something told her she shouldn’t, she shook his shoulder gently and called his name.

His reaction was immediate. Eyes flashed open, a hard hand wrapped around her wrist and his whole body pinned her down underneath him. His free hand went for the throat until he realized last moment who she was and buried his fist in the pillow next to her head. His eye were wild, his breathing heavy and cold sweat was dropping from his forehead.

“Tasha?” his voice was a distorted whisper. His whole body trembled and he suddenly scrambled away from her. “Oh God Tasha, I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

Natasha was still frozen in shock that he had attempted to hit her. When she finally found her voice back, she only uttered:

“Nightmare?”

Clint ran a hand over his face and rubbed his eyes.

“Memory,” he corrected, but it didn’t make her feel better. “Maybe it’s…I didn’t have one in awhile, I’m sorry.”

His hand made a vague motion towards her, like he was tempted to touch her, but retracted right away. Natasha made the first move instead and scooted closer, taking his face between both hands. Her heart still pounded, but she knew that this was probably PTSD, and she didn’t want him to think she blamed him for anything. She called onto her omega instincts in the hopes it would soothe him. Clint closed his eyes and let himself relax into her touch.

It felt odd, having him vulnerable, after all the times he had offered comfort for her nightmares. Natasha smiled bitterly at the irony; now it was her turn to take care of him.

“You’re safe here, alpha-mine,” she whispered, leaning forwards to brush his forehead with her mouth. “I won’t let anyone hurt you anymore.”

He snorted but didn’t pull back. Instead, he leaned forwards to rest his head in the crock of her neck.

“You’re the only thing that kept me breathing back then,” he whispered, so quietly she barely heard. “I fought, but only to come back to you.” He retreated and his eyes met hers. “I love you, you know that, right?”

Natasha’s heart skipped a beat and she just stood speechless. Clint never felt the need to tell her what he felt, she could count on her fingers the number of times he had used the L-word in the past. Words had never mattered, so the small, pleased shiver that ran up her spine caught her off guard. She was only revived by the pressure of his lips pressed against hers, his hands sneaking around her waist.

She allowed the caresses to go through and let him lay her down. Unexpectedly, he then rested his head on her collarbone and wrapped himself around her. His breathing pattern slowly evened and he fell asleep in that position. Natasha held him protectively against her. If this was his way of seeking for comfort, then be it.

 

**AO**

 

They headed to Stark Industries the next day with Maria driving. The Alpha female kept glaring at Clint through the rear mirror.

Natasha had decided to come for emotional support. She disagreed with the candidate, perhaps because of his public image while the pack’s style was more about staying underground. She wasn’t surprised at the tension rolling off the woman’s shoulders. In fact, she was even more surprised Maria had even agreed to come. The female alpha had only been twenty seven at Barton’s ‘death’ but she had handled all responsibilities. With Natasha’s mental instability at the time, the omega couldn’t imagine how much pressure had rested on the female alpha’s shoulders. The pack had done its best to behave, but it needed a strong and capable leader to hold on. Maria had already proven herself an efficient subaltern. Taking the head of the pack was something she hadn’t been prepared for.

Personally, Natasha thought she had handled the situation better than anyone expected.

“I’m only doing this because I use to trust your judgment,” Maria warned as they turned into the Stark Industry parking. “If it’s a waste of time, you owe me big.”

“Believe me, I’m thankful,” Clint assured her, and Natasha could hear the sincerity in his tone. She could feel that Maria agreeing to meet Stark meant a lot to him. Maybe that was why she had agreed, the redhead thought afterwards, to comfort Clint into his part of the pack, to let him know his voice wouldn’t be cast aside.

Maria’s eyes rested briefly on her, and Natasha sent her a discreet, grateful glance, to which she replied with a nod. All this time spent with Maria trying to keep her head out of the water had brought them closer, and the redhead knew she would probably never be able to pay her back for everything she’s done.

They entered the building, Clint leading them towards the front desk. He spoke to the receptionist –beta, bounded –directly:

“Hi, I’m here to see Stark. Could you tell him that Barton is waiting for him?”

The woman replied dryly:

“Mr Stark is a busy man, if you want to see him, you need to set an appointment.”

Clint rolled his eyes. Maria looked ready to bang her head against the closest wall.

“Nevermind, I’ll call him myself.” He pulled out his cellphone and dialed a number. The receptionist looked unsure all of a sudden. Natasha watched Clint’s expression as someone picked up. “Hey Stark, mind coming downstairs? I’m here to say hello.”

He hung up without expecting the other to answer and asked the receptionist again: “Waiting area is?”

She wordlessly pointed at a space with grey couches and a low table filled with magazines. They didn’t have time to reach it though; before they could even take a few steps, a chirpy, loud and irritating voice erupted from a door on the side.

“Legolas!”

And there came Tony Stark, walking wide strides towards them. The people in the main hall all froze to watch the man walk straight towards the visitor, arms wide open. He hadn’t changed from the last time Natasha saw him; he still had that arrogance and exuberance dripping off his shoulders like a coat. The fact he was friends with Clint didn’t change her feelings towards him one bit.

Following Stark closely behind was –to Natasha’s surprise- Pepper holding a pad and an irritated expression. The redhead knew her colleague occasionally worked for the billionaire, but she hadn’t expected to find her here today. Pepper blinked in surprise when she spotted her.

“Natasha?” she blurted cautiously, clearly wondering what the redhead was doing here with a man her boss was familiar with and another woman, a brunette, who looked like she’d like to be anywhere but here.

“Pepper,” Natasha returned with a nod. The billionaire turned a blind eye to their greeting as he ushered the three visitors towards the elevators and led them to a huge living space with couches and a mini-bar. On the way there, he and Clint exchanged meaningless jabs, which surprised Natasha; she wasn’t used to see the extravagant man so polite, if politeness existed for such a man, to anyone else.

“What the heck are you doing here?” Pepper asked as she cast her slightly aside, unwillingly catching her boss’ attention. Stark’s grin widened as he set his gaze on the redhead.

“Ooooh, miss Romanoff, what a pleasure to see you back amongst us!” he cooed suavely. He then glanced at Barton. “What she’s doing here?”

Clint wrapped a possessive arm around her shoulder. Stark lost his smile immediately as the suggestions hit him.

“Oh. _Oh_!” he babbled and turned towards Natasha; “I apologize for every misplaced word or inappropriate behavior I might have with you, Miss Romanoff. You are welcome to return anytime.”

Natasha raised a questioning eyebrow as Clint chuckled.

“Really Tony; a gorgeous redhead with a will of steel?” she nearly beamed at the compliment. “You should have made the connection earlier.”

The billionaire made a vague gesture before turning his attention on Maria.

“And you may be?” he asked, the leer back in his eyes. In the background, Pepper face-palmed herself.

“Maria Hill, FBI,” the woman replied coldly. “And Alpha leader of the Shield pack.”

This time, Natasha could feel Pepper’s incredulous gawking at the back of her head. Stark looked a little less enthusiastic all of a sudden.

“Ah, are you trying to recruit me? Because I will let you know that-“

“She’s my pack leader,” Clint interrupted before glancing at Natasha. The omega turned towards Pepper and smiled brightly.

“Why don’t we leave them talk business?” she offered, and the strawberry redhead nodded. She still cast a worried glance at her boss. Stark didn’t share her anxiety, rather appeared interested.

The two women exited the room. The moment the door closed behind, Pepper glared at Natasha.

“You have some explaining to do. What’s going on there?”

Natasha realized she must have embraced her inner Clint when she blurted with a shrug:

“Short version: my alpha’s not dead, is best buddies with Tony Stark and wants to enroll him in our pack. That was our Alpha leader, Maria.”

“And the guy was your alpha?” Pepper asked with a suspicious raised eyebrow.

“ _Is_ ,” Natasha corrected. She paused and frowned. “By the way, is Stark really your mate? Because you two smell alike and I don’t think you’ve ever gave us his name.”

“That is not important,” Pepper interrupted, either to evade the question or too busy focusing on the news. Natasha would bet it was both. “Your alpha is _alive_?”

“Pretty much.”

The alpha frowned and bit her lower lip, like every time she was thinking something over.

“So…I will assume that Steve’s injuries come from him and not you?”

“News travel fast, I see.” Natasha replied bitterly. “What do you know?”

Pepper sighed.

“He called at the office to take a few days off, something about getting hurt in a fight. But we all knew he was planning to visit you. That’s all I gathered.”

Now the whole office probably knew. Damn, she had hoped the reason for the assault wouldn’t be widely known, although if the story came to Darcy’s ears, then it wouldn’t stay a secret for long. Natasha knew that if the assistant didn’t get hold of the details, and she suspected in the end that it wouldn’t matter, she would inevitably end up being the bad guy. Even if they would never be bounded, Darcy nearly worshipped Steve.

“Steve was being an alpha, and Clint had to interfere before things got too…” She shrugged and left it there. Just because she respected Pepper and didn’t want her to hate her, didn’t mean she’d open up on everything.

Pepper didn’t insist, but the accusing glint in her eyes diminished. Good; at least she’d have one ally when she returned to work. Maybe two, since Loki just tolerated Steve.

“So, you and Stark?” Natasha repeated, happy to have the conversation headed elsewhere. The alpha rolled her eyes.

“He’s an ass, a jerk, a playboy and a beta, but he’s a genius and a good person underneath. And I enjoy a good challenge.” Pepper added as an afterthought. “You understand why I don’t talk about him?”

“Taming the beast?” Natasha replied playfully, but nodded in agreement. The reputation of Tony Stark, although he had made efforts to redeem himself lately, could only clash with Pepper’s and might harm her credibility during trials.

The alpha gave her a tight smile.

The doors blew wide open and Maria stormed out, red faced and extremely pissed. Natasha winced, feeling the interview hadn’t gone that well. And then Clint followed, unsurprisingly subdued, but with a small grin on his face. Last came Stark, his jaw still hanging low in disbelief. The redhead joined her alpha and asked:

“So, how did it go?”

Clint didn’t bother answering; Stark did it for him.

“Did she say I’m in? Cause I’m pretty sure I did nothing but piss her off.”

“Congratulations, Stark,” Clint chipped in cheerfully. “I’ll pick you up for the next meeting and your official introduction to the pack.”

He dragged Natasha by the elbow, hurrying behind their pack leader, perhaps in fear Maria would drive off without them.

“Did Maria really approve of him?”

“She saw through his bravado right away,” Clint replied, speaking quietly. “She knew saying yes would be the last thing he’d expect, especially with the icy glares she kept sending, and her reputation.” When Natasha looked puzzled, he added with a smirk. “He googled her discreetly. And he saw how she handled Vanko and the governor in Florida. I think she’s starting to scare him.”

The redhead chuckled and looped her arm with his.

“Then I can’t wait for the next gathering.” She said, and his smile told her as much.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow will be a busy day, so the new chapter is for tonight. Last chapter will be up next Sunday.   
> unbeta-ed work, so all mistakes are mine.   
> Hope you enjoy :)

**To Never Submit Again**

**8**

 

“You said that Steve Rogers was a co-worker, right?” Natasha nodded. “Will that damage your work dynamics?”

The redhead finished buttoning her shirt and glanced at her reflection in the mirror one last time. She was due to return that morning to work and had mentioned the blond alpha worked there. As expected, Clint hadn’t taken the news lightly.

“Steve is really appreciated and does good work. We helped each other out, and people thought we’d make a good bind.” She explained. “People at work might be more upset at me rejecting him than what he’s done.”

Clint stepped back against her and wrapped a possessive arm around her waist.

“He touches you one more time, just say the word.”

Natasha smiled, turned around and leaned into his embrace.

“It won’t be necessary. I can handle this.” Her voice came out like a purr. “I like it when you’re like this.”

“Homicidal?” Clint asked with a hint of disbelief.

“Possessive.” She corrected with laugher in her voice. “I’ve been fighting against alphas since you’ve disappeared. Having you back…” she cupped his cheek and brushed his lips. “It feels refreshing…feels _right_. When you’re there, it’s like nothing can happen to me. It’s corny but I have no other word.”

Clint lowered his head and devoured her mouth in response. Natasha ended up leaving her apartment fifteen minutes late.

 

AO

 

As she stepped through her workplace’s entrance, Natasha felt the sudden urge to turn around and drive straight home. This was the first day she would spend away from Clint since he returned, and it felt…surreal. It was like she never left, like the past week had been a dream. That Clint’s return was a dream. She glanced at her mobile, checking the picture on her wall. Clint and she were smiling at a selfie she had taken the previous day, and she had chosen it as her background picture to make sure she wasn’t dreaming.

The picture was still there, and her alpha was still smirking with laughing eyes at the camera. The sight gave her a pang in her chest. She wanted to go back and spend more time with Clint and she didn’t want to face the probable angry mob taking Steve the Golden Boy’s defense.

But this was her job, and she w               as one of the bests. And Clint had encouraged her to go and promised to surprise her when she’d return home tonight. When she’d return to _him_.

For the first time in years, Natasha hated her job. At first, she had chosen it to keep her mind busy. Now that her alpha was back, she was reconsidering her choice of career.

Her phone vibrated, signaling the arrival of a text.

_‘Get them all, omega-mine’_ it said with a smiling smiley. Natasha smiled, put the device back in her pocket and headed to the elevators, suddenly in a much brighter mood.

She had barely stepped into the corridor that she was, as expected, welcomed by a furious Darcy:

“What the hell did you do to Steve?” she hissed angrily. Natasha rolled her eyes and returned to her desk. A pile of unopened files were already awaiting her. Jeez, she hated Mondays. “He showed up with a concussion and a broken arm and I’m sure broken ribs! We all know he went to see you this weekend and when he wouldn’t talk about it…I know you have something to do with this! Now you better have a goddamn good explanation!”

Natasha ignored her and turned the computer on. She could feel her colleagues’ gaze on her, watching eagerly the confrontation. Being the best didn’t mean she always had friends, and most were ambitious enough and would love to see her get into trouble. Bullies had stopped trying years ago so that left Darcy who, while having a reputation of not getting involved into fights, had a meaner bite than a Doberman.

“Oh you’re ignoring me now? Don’t play stupid Romanoff, you know Steve’s been hung on you for years and you kept playing him! You’re so high and mighty, I bet you don’t give a damn of people’s feelings, you cold-hearted bit-“

Natasha stood up, turned around, grabbed the assistant by the collar and, with strength little knew about, pulled her up till she was halfway standing on her toes. Darcy started to panic, uneasy with the contact and more importantly, the unexpected behavior from the redhead, but didn’t back down.

“If you can’t hear the truth, it only means you’re weak!” she went on.

A few colleagues, betas mostly, approached with the firm intention of breaking them. Natasha growled and showed her teeth. None of them moved anymore. One even swallowed heavily and took a step back. Even when she was angry, she had never let herself lose control. She had worked too hard to risk getting fired over a temper. But now? Now the perspective of losing her job wasn’t so scary anymore. She wouldn’t be alone if she did.

“You assume I could put Steve Rogers, an alpha, out of commission, during a heat. Where did you hear the story, eh? Who told you I raised my hand on him? Did you make it up in your stupid little mind and decided there was no other outcome than me a bitch set on destroying Rogers’ reputation? Guess what, Lewis, Rogers is still human with his strength and weaknesses and he is far from perfect, no matter how hard he tries to be.”

She released Darcy, throwing her away forcefully. The assistant nearly tripped as she landed on uneasy feet.

“He came to your house to help you!”

“Forcing a bind on me is helping?” Natasha snorted, and a couple coworkers gasped in shock. Darcy widened her eyes a moment, then narrowed them in denial. “I would have fought the bind, I would have found a way to break it and it wouldn’t be pretty. Thankfully my alpha took care of it.” She narrowed her eyes and smirked. “That’s where he got roughened up.”

Darcy hissed:

“Stop lying! Your alpha is dead, you told me yourself!”

“And so you told Steve?” Natasha shot back bitterly. “It turned out he isn’t quite as dead as expected and he was there when Rogers paid me a visit.” She lowered her neckline where Clint had marked her that morning. The assistant suddenly looked torn between unease and disbelief. “So yeah, he was lucky to get away with nothing else but a concussion and a broken arm.” She released her clothe and growled again; “Now scam back to your desk. And if you update Rogers, do tell him to stay away, of my alpha won’t be so lenient next time.”

Darcy stared at her in silence, like she didn’t recognize her at all. Natasha kept glaring, and when the omega didn’t move, started growling again. She fled, probably to narrate her confrontation to all her colleagues and complain to Loki. The redhead then eyed her colleagues one by one, until they all retreated to their own desk. Once she was the only one standing, she sat on her chair and bit back a sigh.

The urge to call Clint became overwhelming, but she had attracted enough attention for the morning. Instead, she reread his morning message and wrote back a short ‘ _thanks_ ’.

He called ten seconds after receptions.

_“What’s wrong Tasha?_ ” Natasha had no idea how he knew she wanted to hear his voice, but she wasn’t about to ask. _“He’s come around yet?”_

“Remember what I told you about my colleagues being more angry than disappointed?” she whispered, not willing to let said colleagues eavesdrop.

There was a heavy silence on the other end.

_“What can I do to help?”_ he eventually asked.

“Try not to die before me, alpha-mine,” she replied. Another silence settle, those words having been used before, but in a different context and for different reasons. “I don’t think I’ll be able to survive it twice.”

He had to remember that moment, she thought. That night when…

_He looked pained and miserable, sitting alone on that couch in front of the TV. The sudden urge to wrap her arms around him and hold him tight surprised her._

_“Hey, Clint.” She called out gently, taking a seat next to him, her hand brushing the top of his knee. “What’s wrong?”_

_“Our alpha died today.” He replied, his voice terse with sadness. “Do you remember Fury?”_

_She briefly pictured the tall man wrapped in the black leather coat and the eyepatch._

_“He’s the one who died?” Clint nodded. “How?”_

_“Car accident. The news was all over it today.” He swallowed heavily. “The pack wants me to step up and take his place.”_

_She straddled his thighs and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, guiding his head in her neck. He immediately held her tight against him, his face pressing against her jaw. She felt him tremble, moisture damping her cloth but he never made a sound. His nails dug deeper in her back, his breath became uneven. Natasha made cooing sounds, her hand brushing the soft hair at the base of his skull. His pain –alpha pain –was threatening to submerge her, and she suddenly understood another role he hoped she would endorse; in time of need, he’d want her to support, to comfort him._

_“Do you want to share a bed tonight?” the words were out of her mouth before she could stop them, but she found that she didn’t want to take them back. “You don’t need to be alone.”_

_His hold on her loosened slightly and he pulled back to face her. His eyes were slightly reddened and bright, his skin damp but his mouth was halfway smiling._

_“You’re here, I’m not alone.” He replied before pressing a damp kiss on her cheek. Natasha closed her eyes briefly and inhaled sharply. Her hand cupped his jaw and pushed his forehead against hers. She initiated the kiss this time, brushing, then pressing her lips against his mouth. She felt him tense, unsure of the meaning of her actions. Natasha broke the kiss and smiled tightly at him._

_“I don’t know how to comfort you,” she admitted, running a hand in his hair. “What can I do to make you feel better?”_

_Clint blinked twice, absorbing her words. Then, he nudged her nose with his._

_“Just stay where you are, omega-mine. And don’t die before me. I don’t think I could handle losing you.”_

She returned to the present at the sound of his voice.

_“That bad?_ ” he asked with a certain gentleness. _“I was going to meet with Phil and May today. But they’ll understand if…”_

“Don’t, I’ll be fine,” she interrupted with a half-smile. “Don’t let them knock you around too hard, I’d like to have you in one piece tonight.”

_“Tell them that. I can’t wait to see you tonight too.”_

They exchanged goodbyes, not needing actual words to say the important things.

After the altercation with Darcy, the morning went by uneventfully. The cases she was supposed to take care of had gone smoothly, even though she needed to review a few details with her assistants and definitively buy Loki lunch for the work he’s done in her absence. The clock was close to ticking twelve when she decided she had done enough and needed to feed herself. Natasha saved her data, closed the computer and left for her usual spot. Unfortunately on the way, she stumbled upon the last person she wanted to today.

Steve was there, in his full innocent Steve-ness, standing with his bag, in his usual clothes, blinking at her like a man lost in a maze. The only difference was…he had a huge black eye and his left wrist was in a sling. Natasha’s senses flared and she nearly hissed at his sight. But not wanting to cause a mess, she decided to ignore him and walk straight past him. Steve, of course, didn’t take the hint and followed her.

“Can we talk in private?” he asked quietly. Natasha sent him a hard glare.

“Get out of my way, Rogers.” She ordered, and Steve flinched slightly at the tone. She wouldn’t forgive him easily, if at all. In spite of Clint’s order, she suspected she had been lucky not to get harassed earlier. She probably had to thank the pack’s surveillance for that.

“But listen-“

She shoved him away and walked past him, ignoring him with her head held high. When he turned round to grab her arm, she kicked him in the knee and sent him into the wall. Again. He yelped loudly, his already fragile ribs no doubt protesting from the treatment.

“Are you crazy?” a woman –Laura from stats, unbounded beta- screeched at her and ran to Steve’s side. When Natasha turned around, she noticed James Barnes’s door was opened and the man was standing in the threshold, not pleased at all.

 

**AO**

 

Barnes had been willing to hear her out, but barely. He understood her reasons although he didn’t have to like it. In retaliation for ‘office behavior’, he had her sent on two days leave, starting that afternoon. He had assured her that Steve would not be allowed in her part of the office though. Still, it frustrated the hell out of her that they’d come to this. When she walked out of the building, ignoring the stares and glares directed at her, she nearly missed the familiar shape sitting on a bench nearby.

“What are you doing here?” she asked with a raised eyebrow. Clint grinned as he stood up and rejoined her.

“I heard you had a hard morning, and I was in the area.” He caught her elbow and pulled her into a gentle kiss. Natasha sighed against his mouth and closed her eyes. “I was worried.”

“So you ditched May and Phil for me?” she chided, but felt grateful.

Her forehead rested against his and both breathed in. It felt better, knowing he was having her back. She didn’t care if each and every of her colleagues saw her with him in the most scandalous display of affection she ever allowed from anyone. All that mattered was the warmth of his hand against her cheek, the gentle breeze of his breath against her mouth.

“And I brought some latte.”

A genuine smile grew on her lips and she initiated the kiss this time. She ignored the looks of disbelief that were shot at her, gladly loosing herself in her alpha’s attentions.

“Did I ever mention you are the best?”

“Only for you, omega-mine.” He replied, taking her small hand in his larger one. “Only for you.”

They started walking away, hand in hand. When they were away from her workplace, his expression turned more serious. “So tell me now, what happened with your boss?”

“Steve and he go back in the army. He sort of understood because I…he was interested in me a few years back. He’s the one I was considering.” She admitted, lowering her head a bit shamefully.

“And I told you, you were in your right,” Clint replied tersely.

“James was good to me, he helped me forget for a while.” She paused and stepped closer to him. His arm wrapped around her waist in response. “He’s a good man, Clint. If you’d meet him, I think you’d even get along.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” he replied quietly, but he clearly had no intention of meeting James.

“So what now?” she asked, leaning her head against his shoulders. Really, what was wrong with her? She never, ever was that affectionate before. In response, Clint lowered his head towards her and stole a kiss from her. If it had been up to him, Natasha knew they wouldn’t leave the bed for days.

“Now, I’m going to bring you to a nice place I’ve found about on the way. I’m going to get you one of those waffles you love, and then,” he lowered his voice, “we’ll burn the extra calories.” Then he pulled back and added: “If you agree.”

Natasha laughed. She couldn’t help it, his eager, puppy eyes were too cute. He had always known how to cheer her up.

“You are determined to keep me happy for the rest of my life,” she said, peeking his cheek.

“I always take good care of what’s mine,” he replied with a smirk, but she read a hint of hunger and lust behind his eyes. “And you, omega-mine, are the most precious thing I have.”

And just like that, the world stopped turning, her heart stopped beating and she was taken with that smirk, that hunger and the way he looked at her.

“They deliver waffles.” She suddenly said. Clint blinked in confusion. “They deliver waffles, at the place you’re planning to bring me.”

“And so?”

“Why don’t we _start_ burning calories?” she suggested. The predatory glint in his eyes and the way his mouth crocked wickedly were the exact answers she was hoping for.

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it, last chapter..Thanks to everyone who read this till the end, I hope you enjoyed it :)  
> Un-betaed work, so all mistakes are mine

**To Never Submit Again**

 

As she hurried home, Natasha could feel the weight of the letter at the pit bottom of her pocket. She hadn’t expected its contents, hadn’t even started thinking of the consequences, but in overall, she should have sort of expected it. A full month had gone by since Clint had returned. Nothing had changed that much in her daily life. She kept to her usual schedule, he did his own business –she learned later that Phil and May had found him a job back at a local police station. They got along well, argued sometimes –she would never accept that he dropped his dirty shoes on the carpet, and he hated that she always let stuff laying around- but alpha wise, Natasha knew he was exactly what she wanted.

It did help that they could understand each other perfectly. And that they had each other’s back, no questions asked. Not the mention the ridiculous amount of sex. She had trouble walking straight nearly every day.

Not that she was complaining, mind her.

But this? This might tip the balance. She didn’t know how he’d welcome the news, didn’t know if his reaction would be positive or negative, if he’d…if anything would change. Everything would change, Natasha rationalized, the question was _how much_.

She stopped at the front door and took a deep breath. Clint’s shift ended early today so he probably was sitting in front of the TV or preparing a meal, depending on his mood and need to busy himself. When she pushed the door open, she smelt food. A sharp inhale informed her that he was preparing meat and something else. Good day then, she thought and hurried inside.

Clint didn’t turn around when she entered the kitchen, but he did move when she caressed his back. His soft smile brought one to her mouth and Natasha gave him a chaste peck on the lips

“You look happy,” she said, her hand still running over his waist. It had been a habit since he’d return; touching him at all times.

“Everything went smoothly,” he replied and returned his attention to the cooking. “I got a new partner, solved a case…and now you’re here.” The last words were added with a smug smirk, to which Natasha didn’t quite reply. That worried him immediately. “Is something wrong Nat?”

The redhead sighed and tugged at his shirt.

“Clint, can we talk?”

Her alpha stared at her worriedly and lowered the heat of the cooking. Once he was done, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him fiercely.

“I thought you wanted to talk?” he said/asked with a raised eyebrow. She smiled shyly against his lips.

“I do,” she whispered before kissing him again, much softer and gentle. She was too anxious to speak, and he felt it. Once the kiss ended, he pulled back reluctantly. Natasha stared at his chest, not willing to face him in the eye yet.

“Nat, what’s going on?”

His tone was gentle and worried at the same. It was the same tone he used when she came back from work, the early days. Steve Rogers kept his distance and her coworkers were still too scared of her to attempt retribution, but it didn’t stop a few brave souls to make her life hell. Matt Murdock himself had to intervene, gave everyone a clear warning and slapped a few wrists, but in the end, Natasha was left alone. But it hadn’t been all easy.

Natasha inhaled sharply and redirected his hand to cover her abdomen.

“We didn’t exactly used protection when…the first nights,” she whispered, avoiding his gaze, and she felt more than heard the sharp inhale when realization fell.

“Nat, are you-“

He didn’t say the word, but they were on the tip of his lips. So she decided to throw herself.

“We have a check up at work and the doctor came with that result.” Gathering the little guts she had left, she braced herself and stared at him: “I know this is early and sudden and unexpected and we’re unprepared but I…” His face was stone hard and unreadable. She swallowed heavily. “I think I want to keep it. It’s yours Clint, and I-“

He put a finger over her lips to silence her, leaned forwards and kissed her. Natasha closed her eyes when he cupped her cheek and relaxed into his touch. When they broke apart, Clint whispered:

“You are the best thing that ever happened to me, omega-mine.” Natasha’s heartbeat accelerated and a wave of relief washed over her. So he would accept the baby, and gladly, if she trusted the exited glint in his eyes. She swallowed heavily and decided to take it one step further.

“And I was thinking…it doesn’t take over two hours to get an official bound, does it?”

Clint stiffened under her fingers and stared at her in disbelief. She loved the light of hope gleaming in his eyes.

“You…you’re sure?” his voice was so faint she barely heard it. Natasha couldn’t help it; she broke into laughers and kissed his mouth, his cheeks, his nose, his jaw, his neck, everywhere her lips could touch him. When she couldn’t breathe anymore she took his face in her hands and went on:

“It’s stupid, actually. We just…I want us to be recognized. You’re right, this is just a piece of paper but it’s unfortunately necessary. And I…” she lowered her voice to continue: “I want this, alpha-mine. We’re about to start a family, why not organize everything at once?”

She thought she shocked him into silence, but soon after he wrapped her in one of his infamous breath-taking bear-hug and buried his face in her neck.

“Do you want a ceremony?” he asked, his voice a lot rougher that before. She shook her head.

“I just need you.”

“Good.” His voice was still raw with emotion and she felt slightly guilty not having agreed to bind with him earlier. She should have known from the start it was just a matter of time before she eventually caved. “Cause we are doing it ASAP.”

“The city hall must still be open. We can still organize a feast later.” Natasha paused, frowned, and cursed. “Shit; we belong to the pack, it must be validated by Maria.”

“Give her a call, tell her to take a day off tomorrow,” Clint grunted, too busy smelling . “She’ll earn two hundred bucks and she’ll be happy.”

“Two hundred?”

“She doubled bet you’d say yes before the end of this week. And that you’d fall pregnant within two month. Apparently, we have a high sex-drive,” He explained with a shrug. Natasha felt her cheeks redden again.

“She and I need to have a talk.” She muttered.

“Fuck the talk,” he hissed and bit the lower lobe of her ear. Natasha’s breath got caught in her throat and she closed her eyes. This time, she was the one struggling with words.

“I am carrying your child!” she managed to rasp after a while. “I thought you’d rather fuck me!” The look he sent her was positively feral.

“Oh you are so regretting these words darling.”

Natasha returned a coy smirk.

“I certainly hope so.”

 

AO

 

The ceremony –because Maria insisted on a ceremony if only to embarrass them both –took place two days later. Coulson had managed to find last-minute tux for Clint, and Skye had dragged Natasha to a tailor, long-time friend of hers, who specialized in finding outfits for missions. The dress he selected for Natasha had, according to him, belonged to an infamous spy working for an underground operation. It was a pretty dress though, so the redhead didn’t really care; she just wanted everything to be over.

Ironically, this also became the official introduction of Tony to the pack.

The billionaire arrived on time for once, driven by his chauffeur, and dressed in blue jeans and a simple sweater. When he appeared in the doorway, welcomed by Sam dressed in a suit, and when he spotted everyone nicely dressed, he blinked.

“I didn’t realize everyone needed to dress up. Or did I miss something.”

They all exchanged exasperated glances.

“Who forgot to tell him we were going to an official bind?”

An acquaintance of Maria agreed to sign the official documents as the government representative. Along with the pack, Loki and Pepper came as external witnesses. The ceremony itself didn’t take over fifteen minutes (representative went in, asked the standard questions, oversaw the signature of the necessary documents and then handed the papers to Maria who pronounced the binding official). And then they all headed to the warehouse, where a lot of food had been ordered by Thor for the occasion.

“Now that you’re officially bounded, we’re waiting for the firstborn within two years,” Maria warned seriously as they sat around the table. Sam exchanged an amused glance with Skye.

“Given the rate of their mating activities, I’m surprised it’s not already done,” he whispered, and she hid her grin behind her hand.

“In a pack, tradition wants that you name it after your leader,” she went on with the same serious and business-like tone. “Or let the leader name it.”

Clint rolled his eyes and held his now official omega around her waist. Those were archaic rules, but if Maria wanted so badly to provoke Stark into a new argument about alpha dictatorship and rule abuse, she was welcomed to. It amused the rest of the pack anyway and even Stark knew it was just for the game. The lunch went on with the same cheerful atmosphere and stretched into late afternoon. It wasn’t until after the huge cake that the subject returned.

“We are giving our kid Maria as a middle name,” Natasha warned Clint, pointing a fork on which a cherry was planted on. Even if tradition was tradition, she felt their leader deserved it after all she’d done for her.

“And what if it’s a boy?” he asked casually for the sake of argument.

“Marien. I’m not fond of Mario.”

Clint bit back a smile. Sam raised an eyebrow.

“You’ve thought this through already?” he asked, taking a last sip of his glass of wine.

Natasha gave him a cocky grin.

“Katya Maria for a girl, Matthew Marien for a boy. Charlotte Marian and Nathan Maren for extras.” She told him. Paused. And went on:  “But we have about eight months to make up our mind.”

Sam chocked on his drink. Bruce smiled gently. Coulson didn’t look phased, but he did raise an eyebrow. Skye grinned widely.

“I’m gonna be an auntie?” she asked excitedly.

Maria held out her hand towards May.

“Pay up.” she said, and the other woman reluctantly pulled out a bill of fifty.

Loki didn’t appear surprised either, but he did remark out loud:

“You didn’t waste time.”

Natasha smirked at him and linked hands with Clint.

“You don’t need to hear the details, Loki.” She said on a slow, husky tone, batting her eyelashes.

“Do spare me, please,” he replied dryly and raised his glass for a cheer. “I do wish you happiness though. To you, your alpha, and the upcoming brat. Hopefully he’ll inherit your attitude and not his father’s.” He added, giving Clint a pointed stare. Loki didn’t quite like Clint since the latter had pulled a prank on him and switched his best watch for a cheap copy. And Clint resented him for coming back at him by putting too much peppermint in his favorite drinks. Natasha could feel the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

In response to Loki’s words, Maria raised her own glass, quickly followed by the rest of the table.

“And may that last even after death do you part,” she added quietly. Natasha gave her a half smile and drank at her words. Clint squeezed her hand, a guilty glint in the back of his eyes. It was discreet enough for no-one else but her to notice. She didn’t return the squeeze, just stared at her plate absentmindedly.

 _You’re okay?_ he mouthed at her, eyes narrowing into worry.

Was he assuming she was second-guessing herself? That she was wondering whether she had made the right decision or not? Natasha inhaled sharply and closed her eyes a second.

_“We’re there.”_

_Natalia opened her eyes and looked around. They had left the highway hours ago it seemed, and were now in a small suburban house in what appeared to be a quiet little town. She frowned lightly at the thought of falling asleep for so long._

_“Where are we?” she asked, stepping out of the vehicle and walking around it to stand by his side. Clint, her new alpha, looked down at her and smiled. He had a nice smile, she noticed, the kind that brightened his eyes. But she chased the thought out of her head. Smiles were just another form of lies, and she had yet to decipher his._

_“That’s where I live.” He told her. “And that’s where you’ll live too, it seems.”_

_She nodded and followed him inside. Her stuff held into one backpack; aside from a few clothes, she had only taken the portrait of her parents and a pair of worn-out ballerina shoes. The house was cozy inside, although very clean with nearly no decoration._

_“I usually live on base,” he explained when he noted her puzzled glances. “But now that you’re here, I guess I’ll have a reason to return more often.” He kept watching her intensely. “You like it?”_

_“It’s nice,” she replied honestly. Her hand tightened slightly on the handle of her backpack. “Where do I put my stuff?”_

_He motioned upstairs._

_“There’s a free bedroom there, you can take it.”_

_Natalia frowned in puzzlement._

_“But I thought…I’m your omega, it doesn’t bother me, you know. And it’s not like you won’t be sneaking into my bed now and then.”_

_Clint looked upset by her words; and she didn’t understand why._

_“It’s not…” he started then appeared to think better of it. “You’re not at ease around me, and neither am I.” Natalia swallowed guiltily and looked down. Even if her body was willing to recognize him as her alpha, it was harder on her. He had claimed her a week ago and she had given in, but she was still unused to the feeling of standing beside him. “We need time to learn, alright? And we’ll get there. You’re my omega, I’m not leaving you behind.”_

_She nodded uncertainly, knowing only time would tell if she had made the right decision. It wasn’t as if she had much of a choice anyway. The smile appeared back on his face, smaller but more genuine._

_“Good. Welcome home, omega-mine.”_

Natasha rubbed her free hand over her abdomen, knowing this wasn’t so different than all those years ago. She had taken a jump to follow her alpha, and she realized she would do it all over again.

So she smiled, turned to kiss her alpha and, ignoring the amused glances and the whistling of the other members of the pack.

“Let’s go home, alpha-mine. I think we’ve earned it.”

 

 


End file.
